Can someone please get Zach Galiafinakis a bra please?

In Thailand he goes by the name Wan Hung Lo

I was thinking this same thing! I will definitely try it at home, but it’s not practical for public restrooms.

This makes me think of “I got you Babe” over and over and over and over and over.

With the defective condom deal that groupon has, that's not the only thing people soon will be getting from groupon lol

With the defective condom deal that groupon has, that's not the only thing people soon will be getting from groupon…

Damon Wayans's mailman's line "MESSAGE!" from Search instead for Don't Be a Menace.. used to be my go to text tone. its short and to the point.

Met her at a bar, hung a bunch of times and the night usually ended with sex (pretty awesome sex I must admit).

Its not just baseball either. I was at a minor league hockey game (Go Birmingham Bulls) several years ago. Our seats were about 5 rows from the top of the lower level, on the blue line, probably 30 rows from the ice.

For my weeklong vacation i didnt want to pack my Gilette Mach37 Turbo Edge 16 bladed gas operated razor (ok, its just the Mach 3 Fusion Power, but you get the picture) so i bought the El Cheapo double bladed disposable razor.

For the record though, that really was TOO MUCH TUNA!

my Go to recipe is spaghetti. fairly simple using premade ingredients, but i can add some extras to make it my own and it doesn't taste like jarred sauce.

You pissed in the toaster too?!?!

Thats what i was thinking, nice shameless plug and product placement.

Here's your joke in drunkspeak:

Here in Alabama, cases are the norm, not the exception... Or so ive been told. I DEFINITELY don't have a cache of Thin Mints piled in my closets.

that was my first thought too. if you want to find an original and ingenious way to hide/disguise a key, talk to a geocacher. they live for that shit.

jokes from drunk can be the best! a friend was 3/4 lit up and meant to tell the joke "what black white and red and cant fit through a revolving door? a nun with a spear in her head. " which isnt the greatest joke, but it would have gotten a chuckle.

Funny story here, I had never seen the movie Blade Runner. Out of the blue one day I decided to check it out, but I couldn't remember the name of the movie (I may or may not have been stoned at the time) and a movie name popped into my head. THIS movie name. So I sat down and watched "The Running Man" thinking it was…

This is funnier to me than it ought to be. It's like reading a transcript of a person with Tourette's Syndrome. I was just waiting for the guy to yell (type) "BOB SAGET!"

The best way to sneak in that many beers is to carry them INSIDE your stomach, without the bottles.