That assumes there was another game plan to choose.

MLB should give ownership of the team to the Ferguson protestors. Cardinals fans would jump into the Mississippi until it was too shallow to drown in.

Like it’s Mississippi in 1955

Judging by how I get treated when out with my best friend who unfortunately lives there, I was expecting all 46 fears to be “black people.”

I thought Sawks fans were already mutants?

I like this commish better than Selig already.

I think any accelerant should get the job done...

Well, it’s a Facebook-owned app. Considering how selective and ham-handed Facebook’s enforcement of its rules has always been, we shouldn't be surprised.

This is that Mets pitcher that hit the double today, right?

IDGAF, still voting for him. Nice try, next time “expose” something relevant to how he’d be as president or how he’s been as senator.

Hawks fans will believe anything, no matter how nutty...but they won't even entertain the idea that they're the second-best team in the East.

No, because LOLKnicks. They could have the ‘96 Bulls and find a way to fuck it up.

I’d still rather get groped by some weirdo than have to watch the Mets.

Or he blames 47% of the judges.

Shit, this is the first Under Armour product I would buy.

It’s a metaphor for Mitt Romney’s whole life: it's been set up in his favor from day one, and yet he still doesn't do much with it.

They ruined OTR :(

If I've learned anything from the exploits of Florida Man, it's that you can fuck anything if you're brave enough.

How the hell are we supposed to figure out who's poorly hung now?

If we’re gonna be curtailing voting rights in this country, can we curtail those of anyone who voted for this damned fool?