Thanks Obama!

CURSE YOU FLORIDA WOMAN!!!!!!!

She's one of those exceptional people who manage to be both incredibly talented and incredibly bland at the same time. For further illustration see Celine Dion and Josh Groban.

I usually only wear powder to keep my skin from looking shiny.

I know, right?

No, no! You guyz dont under stand!!!! These men are heroes!!!!!!!!11!!!

I think "Doctor Hoe" would have been better.

Parody or prophecy?

Yeah, it seems a common delusion among racist, old white people that the fact that you pay your employees means that they're indebted to you. As if you shouldn't have to pay them for their labor and they should be grateful to you for being nice enough to do so.

Well, since they used the same character models for Frozen as they did for Tangled, this just seems appropriate.

Yeah, it seems like they were just goofing off and things got a little out of hand.

I usually throw away my underwear once the elastic starts to wear out. If they have some damage but are still functional they become "time of the month" underwear.

Based on what I learned in the infant development class I had to take for my psychology major, co-sleeping leads to worse sleep for both the mother and the baby and increases the likelihood of SIDS. There are child care specialists who would argue that allowing your baby to sleep in the same bed with you is…

I didn't say it wasn't, I was just pointing out that it also seemed extremely uncomfortable.

She was knitting with yarn that she had inserted into her vagina...wool yarn...just the thought of it makes me itch.

Not even for the sake of art?

All of Justin Bieber fans are female...and possibly a few gay men.

It's like...poetry. Seriously, someone should write an entire book of "poetry" that consists of nothing but bad translations of product descriptions and see if they can get it published.

Live the dream, you crazy bastard, live the dream!

How many millions of dollars does it cost?