I just got my first order of imps on wednesday! So far I really like some but others dry down to a weird smell on me, I guess I’m picking things that don’t go well with my chemistry. funnily enough, when Depraved wouldn’t wash off completely I smothered it with Morocco! I haven’t gotten to try it besides that but it…

Mentioning the 9/11 gift shop always makes me think of this.

He has a soulful voice and you can pretend it's coming out of someone else's mouth when you listen on the radio.

This is going to be long, because I have a lot of pent up feelings.

I’ve decided I will punish infidelity by never ever leaving him alone. A fate worse than death.

oh ffs just because you decided to sell your vagina to Jesus doesn’t mean the rest of us did.

Dear Unwitting,

And this is the problem with gun laws. They are not enforced and are not followed because there are not enough resources. The NRA has spent millions of dollars ensuring that agencies like the ATF do not have the resources necessary to enforce these laws. I have no problem with the idea of stricter guns laws or new gun…

I mean, if people don’t want to vaccinate their kids, they don’t have to - this bill isn’t requiring compulsory vaccinations. You can still choose not to vaccinate your children so long as you home school them and keep them out of daycare, right? Seems fair to me. I would guess that many courts would view preventing…

Right? If the only reason you’ve heard of a disease is you played Oregon Trail as a child, you shouldn’t be dying of it today.

folks are cleverly infecting anti-vaccination activists with computer viruses embedded in photos and links.

I think we’re all waiting, crouching like gay lionesses, for the first homophobic gazelle to trot across the sacred grounds.

I LOVE that my Facebook page is like 95% happiness and rainbows and the few conservative FB friends I have left are just SILENT. As they should be. If you can’t say something nice, SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT.

Dads, having more kids will not increase your dadness. You have a fixed amount of dad, and you have to dad it equally among all your kids. Just dad a small daddable group of kids, and each kid will get more dad. That’s just sensible dadmath.

Please say there’s a prize because this is something I can win.

Seeeeeeeee my vest!

Nothing works like a good old classic

One time I took Advil and became the Son of Sam.

"The hottest new club in town, down at the abandoned food cannery, has everything. Dirt, gore, zombie trailer discoteque, a two sweaty men crammed into a late model car"