This comment is a fairly hilarious confluence of jealousy and ignorance.

I thought it was a keyboard/blinds cleaner.

No yellow cab driver refuses a Brooklyn fare anymore. Like, since 2007.

Much like Mike Piazza’s “I’m not gay” shindig, if you gotta have a press conference about it, I’m not buying it.

So calling someone the hero of one of the English-speaking world’s most beloved adventure stories is an insult, now? How, exactly, did this obvious genius get W “elected” twice, again?

Publix generic knock-off of Cinnamon Life is really the only way to go. With ice-cold whole milk, only, please.

So, uh, “upscale,” and “fresh seafood” don’t really jive with “pre-made and microwaved.” Something is amiss with that story.

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Penis looks amazing for being on the bottom of a toe.

“Workers” implies wages and choice. Don’t be obtuse.

Without looking it up, I think the Jets may have given the Dolphins the majority of their offensive yards on PI calls. That was the only time I ever saw them move down the field.

My Rottweiler figured out how to open the refrigerator, and ate the entire contents more than once, then figured out how to bite off the child lock; our fridge literally had a chain and carabiner around it for the last 8 years of her life. One time it seemed she had even eaten an entire pound of individually-wrapped…

I mean, I already fucking hate the guy, so...

So many liberals seem to think that the (absolutely inevitable) class war is going to be some Thought Catalog writing exercise, and not the actual violence of an actual war. It’s about time people started taking sustained, physical stands against the gnawing flood of the 1%.

“For fuck’s sake, using any kind of colloquialism makes you look like an ignorant yokel!”

“True” and “False” went out the window in politics so long ago...

Colbert didn’t call him a fraud and an embarrassment to his face, so I’ve lost quite a lot of respect.

Damn. Remind me never to piss off your mom. That said, does she hire out that Evil Eye of hers?

That dude looks like he should be in the stands at an Alabama Crimson Tide home game pretty much every day of the year.

“Dignity” is not a concept this woman is qualified to speak on.

She’s absolutely right, no matter her political leanings. American government has become such a crybaby bitchfest that it’s blatantly obvious most of them don’t care one fucking bit how their petulant bullshit plays out in the real world, and drastically affects real people. Good for her for calling them out.