Vanilla Ice is suing to get his schtick back.

Joining him:

KINJAAAAA!

I would rather sit through “Jersey Boys” a hundred times (which I saw once and thought it was complete hagiographic garbage) than watch even one act of this thing. Who is it for? How did it get backers? Who thought it was a good idea? I love theater. I love musicals. I am starting to hate Broadway.

Which is why I always pack her passport.

So much good stuff here. Especially the bit about not changing your voice (they’re humans, not puppies) and not opening with how pretty/cute the kid is. I find that if you talk to kids pretty much how you would talk to an adult (maybe minus the swearing) they can totally hang. And “go with the weird” works just as…

I always bring my kid’s passport when we travel domestically, because it’s the only ID she has (it has never occurred to me to bring her birth certificate because maybe that’s her and maybe it’s a different kid the same age, y’know?). I have never been asked for it. Not once. She’s half-Japanese with a different last…

God damn it, that sink hole outside the White House can’t open quickly or widely enough.

Just 1 point? Give him 10. 20 if the punter does it. Make football into an hour of kickers and long-snappers doing their thing. I would 100% watch that.

Et tu, Tony Hale? hashtagdisappointed

Cannot unsee. Do not want to unsee. The thought is delightful.

To the squalid catalog of Michael Cohen’s crimes, let us add “buttons both buttons on his suit jacket.”

I object to you besmirching the character of Beaky Buzzard. Or is it Beaky Bu22ard?

Needs more Yakety Sax.

I honestly have no idea who Gaspar Noe is. So I have that going for me.

I will watch this because I am “of a certain age” and watching these two together is a little like seeing old friends. Such a sucker, am I.

Put Ichiro at second!

I am an old, liberal, white guy in a suit. I am somehow both represented and offended by this meme.

YooHoo and Vodka. We called it The Boris Yeltsin (alternately, the White Trash Russian).

Imagine me being held down and given an injection while I scream my above comment, as witnesses cover their mouths and shake their heads in pity.