ohballs
ohballs
ohballs

NOPE. War declared. On this guy. By me.

I dunno, a quality set of man-cleave can be quite the distraction.

When I was 8...I was obsessed with Laura Ingalls Wilder and all things pioneer. My mother got me a jackknife for my birthday and I would sit outside our apartment whittling. I whittled a dolphin out of a branch and then quit, because I realized I had hit my peak.

Yes! We spent hours showering! And it was cold outside, so we would hang out on the patio and get cold, and then take a hot ass shower. God, how much did that rule?

Thanks, dude. I'm kind of square. : )

I'm a yoga teacher, and part of what I consider my "job" is to be visible on social media as a yoga teacher. But the hardest part for me has been taking and posting pictures of myself, because I don't like myself. I think I look absurd and ugly most of the whole time. I wish I had the confidence to share my practice

  • "Amber Heard made out with Johnny Depp even though he was wearing an unacceptable hat. [Just Jared]"

For our mutual birthdays last year, my partner and I got a fancy schmance hotel room (Free! I worked for the company and I got one free stay a year.) for a night, took some amazing molly, and spent the next ten hours boning and prancing around in fancy schmance hotel robes. I had never had sex whilst tripping before,

Listen, if I get you a baby gift, it's going to be soft and have frogs on it. End of story.

At first I thought you meant Oklahoma City misery. Which I would also understand.

I bartended at a weird work party tonight and got a little buzzed and pulled a French exit. Now I'm lying in my bed singing the Royal Canadian Kilted Yaksmen song to myself to see if I still remember all the words (I do) and would pay someone all of my money for a grilled cheese sandwich even though I'm slowly

Oh fuck. If Pink's logic stands, I'm knocked up with 53 sleeves of Thin Mints. I'm gonna need you to contribute to the registry, Pink.

When I graduated the 8th grade, my mom took me to see the Chili Peppers and the Foo Fighters when they toured together. We had a ball, and my dearly departed mama loved her some Flea. I have a special place in my heart for these dudes.

"Love is patient, love is GIANT FUCKING TURTLE!"

They will be eaten by merciless seagulls...

Dude, I don't even have a kid, but if anyone ever ever ever ever touched my hypothetical ether-kid that I do not as of yet have, I would smash them. Done and done. Fuck this shit.

Oh snap! Thanks for the recommendation!

I have small boobs and so am not able to relate to what not wearing a bra means for anyone who needs more support. To be perfectly honest, I never wear bras unless I can help it, and the only reason I do wear them? Pure nipple suppression.
And frankly, I resent it every time.

Just as long as she doesn't try to build an Ice Town a la Ben Wyatt.

Yes.