I’m so lazy, I legit go to take a mirror pic, see how dirty it is, and then just give up on the picture.

I’m sure she’ll be treated the same as say, a male African American drug dealer with no DEA agent father?

A woman that was in a marriage openly talking about a relationship outside of that. Acknowledging she didn’t know who the father was. Discussing that and abortion with her husband. Husband supporting that decision.

I just say I don’t know. Try it. Where are the batteries? I don’t know. Do we have any mustard? I don’t know. Are we out of coffee? I don’t know. In the instant that I’m asked, I honestly don’t know. I have to stop and think about it for a few seconds, and, guess what, if I don’t, then *he* has to stop and think or…

Thank goodness humans don’t have to lick their babies clean like cats.

Brb cooking this.

Apparently in Texas you do not have to identify yourself to the police unless you are under arrest. So if they arrested her for not identifying herself, they got the law backwards.

BEST derp face ever. Also high punchability.

Can we just be like, “hey neighbor, you mind uh.. maybe..running America too? I mean we’re like right down here it can’t be that much trouble ....right?”

Tragic Kingdom, Return of Saturn (SO UNDERRATED), Rock Steady and Love Angel Music Baby will never not be some favorite albums of mine. Long live No Doubt and Gwen Stefani, for real.

General Zhukov: Comrade, we have just captured Berlin!

I always love it when I see parents actively teaching their children how to be human beings, it makes my day.

Recently I was in a store and a little boy was blocking an aisle. His mother told him to move out of the way because he wasn’t the only person in the world. Mother of the Year!

yes and YES. That is like a dream illegal pet.

The 9/11 lady needs a punch in the taco. Fuck her in every way possible.

I can’t remember his whole spiel, because my brain was filled with the enraged screams of my primal warrior ancestors and I was battling to keep a pleasant expression on my face.

Yeah, I think statement can go both ways. There are times when “it took a man to say it” is a way of calling out a very questionable person who’s latched onto feminism for his own purposes and whose support does little. But there are also so many other times when a man saying it actually makes people listen and…