BIG FUCKING MOOD.

Thanks again for not using the shooters name.

NO.

I think I also read somewhere that grapefruit juice actually aids in alcohol absorption so you feel the affects more quickly?

Trader Joe’s was selling pickle popcorn for a while. It was highly addictive.

Nah. I stand by my statement.

I’m not going to lie, I have, or have once had, most of the animals on this list (never a rabbit), but yeah, they are weird pets and most people probably should not own them.

I mean, Alex died over 10 years ago and very few African Greys (parrots in general) are ever as lucky as he was to get the type of interaction and care as he got when he was alive. That’s why bird rescues are ALWAYS overrun with sad, self-mutilating, neurotic parrots. People should not own birds.

I had at least one pair of the loafers that I wore to death. I found a pair of these when I was cleaning the garage a few months ago. I loved them so much and they look soooo ridiculous now. I kept them.

Recasting James Earl Jones as Mufasa was the best decision. I’ve not watched any of the other Disney remakes, but I’m sold on this one.

But the parties were actually a thing. They hosted parties in several cities a few years back. They were even featured in People magazine.

Adnan Syed just got denied a new trial.

I resisted Blue Apron for years, but finally bought in after getting into a Doordash rut. Honestly, it was a game changer for me. The meals are usually great and perfectly portioned. It might be slightly more expensive than going to to the grocery store and buying the ingredients myself, but I’m finding that I am…

I can still play “Call Your Girlfriend” on repeat for days. I might have to start alternating it with this.

Nope. It’s the only holiday where I’m not expected to interact with/give presents to my insufferable family and I get to indulge in all of my goth predilections without getting a lot of side eye.

Ok, but you can actually quit drinking and smoking and survive. How do you quit eating?

I’m experiencing something similar right now. I had a serious infection a few months ago and was so sick that I dropped 40 lbs. People at work keep asking me what my “secret is” and I keep responding sepsis. They think I’m joking. Like, no I actually almost died and it was not good leave me alone.

So my cat, my very best man, my special little guy, my only stable male relationship, died a few of months ago. We had him cremated and his ashes have been sitting on our dining room table because I have no idea where I want to put him and he’s kind of in a cute box and I like looking at it when we sit down for a…

Nikias isn’t really gone though. He is “transitioning” into the role of President Emeritus and Life Trustee of the University. My coworker called it. He said that the interim President would be a woman of color. Wanda Austin in going to be the interim President while the search committee looks for another skeezy,…