Story time: My fella and I have one blanket on the bed he loves but I hate. I don’t like fuzzy fabric and the damn thing has this weird nap that makes me shiver whenever it touches me, which in a perfect world would be never. One night I felt that awful blanket graze my ankle so, being the mature cool-headed adult I…

It is to her credit that she’s taken back by the idea of a bed with a $108k price tag and is willing to set foot not only in Sleepy’s but also IKEA and the subway. I’d at least put Gwyneth, the major Trumps, and selected Kardashians ahead of her. Just a thought - now back to my knitting!

Since I will be in the greys forever few will see this, but I had severe hyperemesis gravidarum. It is not morning sickness. It is severe nausea and/or vomiting. It lasted all day, all night, and for the entire pregnancy, when I delivered at 35 weeks due to pre-eclampsia.

Can’t wait for the day they make a movie about Leonardo DiCaprio and the actor that plays him inevitably wins an Oscar.

This is what I am saying! I swear no one is invited to her “events” unless they fit her aesthetic criteria and get their wardrobe pre-approved. Apparently they didn’t even eat the cake at that party. There was an instagram post of them cutting into it the next day. Who the fuck has a party and does not eat the cake??…

Theres a photo of me about..3 hours or so after giving birth: My husband is lovingly holding our son. I’m in the background, looking on from the hospital bed with a box of Cheez-Its in my hand and a mouth full of Oreos.

One of my friends sent around a photo of herself holding her newborn, perfectly coiffed displaying freshly manicured fingers. Big smile with lipstick and lip liner. It. Was. Chilling.

Seriously, folks, put your phone away.

!!! Who turns their house keys over to the airline?

Here is what happened to me: I travel all the time, and had my important docs in my carry on, which had been on literally dozens of international flights with me. The stewardess asks to help me stow the bag, and was pretty insistent on taking it. She takes it towards the front of the plane, and when we deplane in…

Jesse Pinkman’s wife is giving some serious Coachella shade. #yasss

The kid will be named Kanye West Jr.

Somehow the most horrifying thing here is that a 30 year old man told his mother to go to the store to get him a sandwich and a soda - AND SHE DID IT.

She sounds like she was seriously zonked out on something. I mean, it also sounds like the kids were sugar-seeking monsters, but damn, lady!

Shake it off

Much like Icarus, he flew too close to the glorious sun that is Taylor Swift, only to plunge back to earth.

The eyebrow height that KatieKaBoom mentioned is said to be a brow lift, based on how it changed the overall shape of her face and they stay up there, utterly fixed. Also, nose job. Her nose shape now reflects Kim and their mother’s work pretty much to a T when you compare them.

Lucky this happened now. When the season started, no one was able to evacuate at Wrigley.

Somewhere, right now, Stan Bowman is staring at a sheet of paper with the trade summaries of Brendan Saad and Patrick Sharp while gripping a .357.