Can we send them bootstraps?

OH MY GOD! EVERYONE KNOWS THE BEST ASPARAGUS WATER IS HOMEMADE!

Even when I knowingly eat asparagus at lunch, I’m still like “what the fuck is that smell!?” when I pee later in the afternoon. What’s worse is if I also have beets for lunch and it comes out tinted red. I get very worried and then breathe a sigh of relief when I remember my pee is only red and stinky because of lunch.

Can you please stop calling it Whole Check? Please? That’s a Jezebel only joke and it’s terrible. PEople call it Whole Paycheck. Not Whole Check. Whole Check doesn’t even make sense and it makes me wince everytime I see it on this website.

The term “asparagus water” makes me think about how asparagus pee smells.

If you like shows about clever people being horrible to each other, then YES it’s a must see. But if it bothers you to only have people who are deeply morally flawed to root for, then no.

I would have made a scene so big, the guy would never want to touch himself again! WTF is wrong with people???

I was on a Southwest flight (paid for my Group A boarding, picked out my perfect window seat) early in the morning the other day, and a guy sat in the middle seat. He manspreaded the entire time. Throughout the flight, every 15 minutes or so, he would reach into his basketball shorts and give himself a good thorough…

Eric and Kathy say hello.

Snow for a mixed race kid born in July.

I don’t think this counts because I was working at a ‘summer camp’ type thing and I’ve personally never attended one, but I’ll list this anyway.

I call shenanigans on this. Seriously, if this worked all of us Chicagoans would look like supermodels. All of them could save their money and just spend a winter in Chitown instead.

Taye is WAY too far down this list.

He’ll always be Piz to me!

I stopped watching halfway through last season because it was just too ridiculous but season 1 President Grant was flippin’ sexy.

Would forever but not with these glasses on.

I can’t imagine how that would even logistically work! How was it possible to position yourself to allow for penetration without everyone being able to tell exactly what you were doing?

I work at a library, so you can bet that I feel your pain.

A relationship borne out of infidelity has pretty high odds of not lasting. Why? If they are willing to cheat with you, they are willing to cheat on you.