how about Magic the Gathering tournaments on ESPN 2?

“Dammit”

I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my tire fires flaaaaaaming.

Maybe, just maybe the citizens of Los Santos are sick of all these people flying around doing 200mph on the wrong side of the street, shooting each other, running red lights.... and they’re taking matters into thier own hands to try and stop them.

I used to live below the Sheridan stop. It’s also terrifying for the sighted.

Every time I try this, my stupid foot thinks it’s the clutch and I have a bad time.

Do you know why I remain a Patriots fan Drew? Because of my father. I lived in Maine my entire childhood and teenage years. I remember the shit years, the years where Velcro on the gloves wouldn’t have helped the receivers make catches. For years we were the butts of the NFL. Then suddenly Mo Lewis knocks out Bledsoe…

Maybe the answer is to strip away the power of government to force us all to do things. Then New York could be New York and Mississippi could be Mississippi.

As someone who was that kid in high school, I’m gonna project myself on Kyrgios. He’s scared that he may fulfill his potential and still fail. It’s a lot easier to accept an early loss in a tournament because you didn’t try than to give it your all and still come up short because you just weren’t good enough.

Half-assing it at your job is why most of us have time to read Deadspin.

I can’t see the name ‘Jimmer Fredette’ without singing the Davy Crockett theme song:

The shells are far and away where the taste is. But, (and this is incredibly important), you have to examine the shell before you eat it. “Big Peanut,” just like “Big Sunflower Seed,” will throw in a few rancid peanuts in every bag, just to fuck with you. There is nothing worse than biting into that one peanut that…

No.....

Impoverishing public servants is a surefire way to create terrible corruption. One could argue that we already have terrible corruption, but this would be much worse.

Rich people would transfer all assets to a spouse and then work for the government. Dumb idea.

Lessons learned the hard way: Even if your girlfriend says she wants a toaster oven, often muses about how helpful it would be to have a toaster oven, and points out that a toaster oven is on sale at the local appliance store, she does not in fact want a toaster oven as a Christmas gift.

A $250K dollar car “totaled” with only THAT much damage? Yes, obvious suspension damage included. Seems like the Mustang did the PG a favor showing him he spent his money poorly. Particularly the insurance.

Jordan Reed after every play.

So after reading about scatter bands I learned thats its for people who can’t march in time and who aren’t funny enough for the college sketch/improve group