Ok you know what, the lipo in the thighs make a lot of sense. And it makes me feel so much better... If I loose enough weight to make my thighs look skinny, my top half looks like a skeleton and I have no ass. If my top half looks normal and healthy, my bottom half will have jiggle. Glad to know its not possible to…

I’m intrigued. I’ve always just kept a stash of black ones for shark week.

The same assistant is probably expected to wipe Beyonce’s ass in the bathroom, so she may be confused about where the boundaries are.

Wait what what! What procedures? Her face looks very different from the 90s but the body I figured was due to so much dancing and eating vegan and whatnot

I don’t know if you can tell, but Sofia is getting flashed.

LOL. I’ll never forget what she said recently when this was brought up to her. It was something like, “I was just terrified for her nipples! I thought they would fall onto my plate!”

Rebel Wilson did it too.

Remember when Jessica Chastain was caught lying about her age? Part of me says “Yes, I understand the realities of your business. The pressures you’re under to be young. The employability factor.”

Amy doesn’t have as much of a punchable face as Anne, so I think she’ll be good.

It’s just a baby being friendly then. The word flirt has a very specific connotation. It’s weird when the parents insist the baby is “flirting.” Just be like “oh he/she likes you!” or something instead of using a word that is pretty exclusively used in romantic situations. Yuck.

Okay a lot of things I’m not creeped out by because I go on mommy-daughter “dates” with my mom but that is horrendous and I openly cringed.

I am seriously wondering if you’re talking about my cousin because that is WAY TOO CLOSE. In fact, his fiancee was going to either abort or give up their baby until they found out it was a boy so they decided to keep it because: HEIR TO THE THRONE. Kid has my grandfather’s name (a wonderful name for a wonderful man)…

Who invented liquid soap and why?

No but guys! This is important. If my marriage license hadn’t specified “bride” and “groom” how would we have known which is which?

FEEEEED MEEEEEEE!!!

I guess that’s the guy that’s the “son for life”, huh?

“your daughter grows up and becomes a wife, but your son doesn’t marry his baby mama and lives at home with mom and dad and expects them to do his laundry”?

OH! I know! Something about Jesus?

99 out of 100 moms refer to their baby and toddler sons as “My big man” and it creeps me right the fuck out.

Perhaps he means the porcelain verity?