Sickening that Jay Glazer believes 95% of our country’s troops aren’t qualified to be NFL referees.

I think you meant to say that he “takes the L” every day.

This story assumes people have interest in baseball.

It wasn’t me! - Shaggy

Is winning a staring contest against some pud of an assistant GM better than losing one? Only the Seahawks know for sure.

Color me surprised that one of the 45-year-old Stephens’s immediate responses when butthurt is to remind an almost 30-year-old where they went to college.

Warning: It was extremely gross and alarmingly red.

If Fireman Ed showed up anywhere in this story, I’d assume it’d be in the indictment. 

As a local taxpayer, he’s not just an irate stepfather. He’s also an owner.

Alternate headline: Brad Stevens: are we sure he’s good?

Trump added $4 billion to his assets with the previously unused and extremely nebulous line item “Brand Value.”

MacLean later clarified: “I can’t remember if I cried, when I read about his widowed bride, nothing touched me deep inside, the day Robert Traylor died.”

This is the answer I wanted, though I feel like it just begs the question. For the supposed paper of record in the United States, this seems like it should be a letter to the editor. 

Out of curiosity, what exactly qualifies this guy to have his opinion published in the Grey Lady, aside from the fact that it’s bad? There must be a ton of other ex-D-1 athletes in law schools. This reeks of an astroturfing campaign. 

Like old Hitler, Brown will spend the next few months in South America, where he hopes to introduce American football to a new audience. 

To be fair, people who still want to do the tomahawk chop in 2019 probably need it explained in a wordless diagram.

They were given no days off,

Next season, you’ll be able to see the Patriots’ MHK patches from space.

Then I was told my tip (15%) was too small.

When Tokyo hosted the 1964 Summer Olympics, the games were held in October to prevent athletes from having to compete in Tokyo’s oppressive summer heat and humidity (not to mention monsoon season). But alas, the Olympics are too big a commercial event to move.