Did you follow it up with “I save the bread!”?

“There’s been some unnecessary backlash toward you in some of the comments, and that’s counterproductive”

It’s olive oil, not butter. You dip your bread in it.

People shouldn’t be walking around with knives in their hands at all anyway.

“Let them make the first move. If your eyes meet, flash a nice smile and then look away. If she’s interested, she’ll come over.”

I’m sad that I can only give your perfect response a single star.

“As a parent you should be teaching your children the “life lessons” like how to manage money, talk to people properly, how to hold and work a job etc.”

I don’t know if this is still a thing in Australia, but when I was in high school, we had a program called “Work Experience”, in which you spent 2 weeks as an intern in a real job. I did one stint in a hardware shop, & another working as a computer operator (IBM 360 + Vax 11/780s) at a corporate HQ. Both experiences…

“My wife’s mother was a mediocre cook who never showed her how to do anything in the kitchen”

One really important lesson I learnt the hard way as a teenager is to never, EVER work for a family business, because there will be at least one asshole family member who’ll shit on the non-family employees, & the family will ALWAYS take their side.

“What is this pictures origin story? Like, was it at one point seriously used on a dating website or some such?”

‘Shot’ & ‘distributed’ aren’t the same thing.

[Kubrick] “as he shot most of his movies in 4:3”

Well, 16:9 is the default these days.

Is it true that being an annoying pedant about stuff that doesn’t matter makes up for the celibacy?

“unbelievable décor inside of this thing. It was owned by a pair of ancient Hong Kongers”

You only have one nipple? Or is only one getting hard?

Exactly. It annoys the crap out of me that so many people refuse to acknowledge that corporations don’t need to have explicit rules saying “do X illegal thing” in order to force their franchisees/workers into doing illegal stuff.

The ‘melted butter’ is olive oil. You dunk your crusty bread into it. Ideally, there should be a flask of balsamic vinegar nearby to mix with it.

If you’re talking about the stuff in the bowl with the garnish, that’s probably olive oil.