For my birthday a couple years ago, my mom gave me a cute kitty box and inside was a little eye shadow container. It was black, so I thought, ok, interesting choice, Mom. She then exclaims, “Guess who came to visit you!”

Oh I have one!! At my husband’s grandmother’s funeral, the funeral home asked my husband and his male relatives to help them carry out someone else’s casket.

My grandma used to work in a bookstore that sold only romance novels. I used to hang out there as a pre-teen and sneak books so I could read the dirty parts.

I love this show. My FIL is an emergency reconstructive microsurgeon, technically classified as a plastic surgeon. His job, which is 24/7 demanding-as-hell, is in real need of good surgeons. Most of his residents and interns see how challenging his job is and jump ship to simpler plastics. Why be on call all the time…

My mom sewed gloves for the koalas and mailed them to Australia! I hope they’re doing better!

Beat me to it!

Ain't nobody got time for that!

Oddly, she said similar things about having some famous godfathers of her own...turns out none were really her godfathers, only close friends of her dad who hung around the house a lot.

I’ve seen Murphy Brown on TV once in awhile, on DirecTV in the upper 500s. Can’t remember what channel, but some weird one.

I’ve been working my way through late 80s/early 90s TV on Netflix (Wings, Coach) and would love to watch Murphy Brown as an adult! Also, Northern Exposure is on Netflix DVD. More early 90s TV, Netflix!!

I second Iceland!! It's fantastic. And about as cold as NYC in winter.

Slightly off-topic, but my kitty is allergic to EVERYTHING, so for awhile, he was on a kangaroo and squash diet. I had to buy the food from Canada. No way in H-E-double-hockey-sticks would I have ever put him on IAMS if he could eat standard proteins. (Now he eats Nature's Variety rabbit, which makes me have the sad,…

Slightly off-topic, but my kitty is allergic to EVERYTHING, so for awhile, he was on a kangaroo and squash diet. I had to buy the food from Canada. No way in H-E-double-hockey-sticks would I have ever put him on IAMS if he could eat standard proteins. (Now he eats Nature's Variety rabbit, which makes me have the…

I'm pissed that Almay now tests or is associated with testing! That was my go-to for makeup (for the once or twice a year I wear it).

It can be SO.HARD. to find certified cruelty-free products! I don't wear makeup, so finding beauty stuff isn't so much of an issue for me as regular f'n products like toothpaste, cleaners, mayonnaise! You really have to look to make sure what you're buying isn't produced by…

“Capybara lifespan,” “Jill Duggar,” and “Life onboard aircraft carrier.” Those are from work. I can’t imagine what my home computer has saved.

Never had sex.

Can I Snapchat my divorce papers?

One of the USA Today (don’t judge me) crossword puzzle editors is named Tim Burr.

Yeah, I've gotten mixed responses on Sephora being cruelty-free. Love Kiss My Face and Alba! EO does an Everybody/Everyman line of bath products that's also great. I honestly never shop at Sephora because they don't carry many cruelty-free lines.