What’s crazy is I totally would have put Durant first on my list of guys to gift a championship to, but ever since last summer I’ve wanted nothing more than for him to fall down an open manhole and end his career.

12. Bernie Kosar

And congrats to all the Cubs fans for getting another moment to pat themselves on the back for feeling bad about how they ruined this guys fucking life all those years ago. It’s ok now, he’s got jewelry.

His HoF bust should have a pressure sensitive head that results in a hidden fist punching anyone that touches it.

I kept being a Kyrie fan after he said the earth was flat even though I couldn’t stop thinking about it every time I saw him. But fuck this guy. He would have been flailing around with a losing Cleveland team without Lebron. Go ahead and get the fuck out, Kyrie.

Or just write the team name

That “what if” makes me sad...

“the Brown’s kid already has a 1000 yd stare”

The difference between that one and this one is that the Brown’s kid already has a 1000 yd stare. They’re already numb to pain and resigned to the fact that their team will always suck. The Atlanta kid had hope, the Browns kid’s hope died before they were born.

Really this entire article can be encapsulated by a single graphic:

I mean... the people on here know they suck. I’ve heard more than one person say they think the Browns got 6+ wins in them this season.

So the Browns are all of our’s second favorite team just off the suffering their fans have gone through, right? Living in SF where an entire fan base’s interest and commitment is directly proportional to the team’s prospects, I can’t help but have a soft spot for these people. They know their team sucks, they hate…

Your 2016 record: 1-15

All of the letters are gold, but this is a goddamn masterpiece:

And the second was because the Browns had 1st and goal from the 2 in OT and lost 14 yards on a screen pass and had to kick a FG.

Don’t listen to the bad man, honey, I’m sure we’ll be good by the time you’re in college. Or at worst, when you’re a grandfather.

The WYTS articles are my favorite things to read on Deadspin every year. Nothing funnier than reading about other teams inadequacies and the depression of the city and fans that are a result of it. Picking at the super defensive greyed commenters and then promising myself that I won’t do the same when my team’s…

Just want to put out the list of guys with 3,000 hits/450 HRs

I just pray they hang his bronzed plaque low enough for everyone to be able to touch his head for as long as the Hall exists.

I look forward to his induction speech, when Elvis Andrus sneaks on stage and touches his head, and Beltre freaks the fuck out.