Having him slowly rot in misery has a certain appeal, though.

“Yes, Mr. President. But you do have to bring an ID to take out the books. It’s called a library card.”

Oh yeah, that reminds me—from Susan Cheever’s Drinking in America: Our Secret History:

Exactly.

They’ll tell you as soon as they get through explaining how all those lazy Mexicans are stealing American jobs.

One of the “make you smart” notions that get mentioned often is that commercial airliners follow the great circle because it’s the shortest route between two points on the globe even though the flight path ends up as a curve on a flat map. In reality, though, this is not always true because pilots will take advantage…

The temperament of a toddler. The vocabulary of a fifth-grader. The libido of a teenager. And the body of a...well, a septuagenarian. Trump is truly a man of the ages.

Civility is bullshit.

Diaper Don.

Coming soon: the Ford Bedsel.

If the scale shows he weighs too much, it’s Obama’s fault.

In case the image doesn’t load: https://www.euronews.com/2019/02/10/thousands-line-streets-of-viareggio-to-see-satirical-floats

Dumb question: In terms of mechanical components (or maybe just specifically drivetrain), how much sharing/overlap is there among the high-end vehicles in the VW family?

“You laugh at my wrap job with the rusty plastic bumpers one more time, THIS is what’s gonna happen to you!”

I got a few more letters in but still read Hot Chicks — which I guess amounts to the same thing.

Somebody should Photoshop this picture with Lincoln facepalming in the background.

Well it’s the same color as all the fried foods he loves.

If the tint is natural, how do you explain the difference between his face and his hands?

Trump wanted a wall because it’s the only thing his dumb brain could remember. Meanwhile, his henchman (who moonlights as a med school cadaver) Stephen Miller didn’t care about a wall but wanted something cruel and sadistic (i.e., family separation). That’s why the wall never happened even when the Republicans had…

“Well, I was going to veto the omnibus bill and Paul told me in the strongest of language, ‘Please don’t do that, we’ll get you the wall.’ And I said, ‘I hope you mean that, because I don’t like this bill,’”