Apparently when I typed my initial response, it got reworded to say "Hi, my name is Matt, and I'm VERY interested in hearing about how Jewish people fuck through a hole in a sheet"

Oh my god- good for you. I know it makes me a petty, selfish person, but if one of these guys wanted me to move, I would be happy to keep the whole plane sitting there until he knuckled under.

This legit happened to me - I was on the window and another girl was on the aisle, with the Orthodox gentleman assigned to the middle seat...on something like a 12 hour flight. What was crazy is that he just wanted one of us to give up our prime seats so he didn’t have to sit between two women. This girl and I…

Here’s a better switch. If it was a conservative Muslim, rather than a Jew, refusing to sit next to a woman would anyone have any hesitation kicking them off the flight and arresting them?

The block seating idea makes sense I guess, but segregated seating does not. Or at least it would not fly (pun seriously not intended) once that plane entered the US.

When I was a F/A I heard some stories of Hasidic men asking the flight attendants if they were “dirty” meaning on their periods on flights to Tel Aviv. Apparently the men cannot accept service items from “dirty” women. Most F/A’s would answer that they were absolutely on their period.

Look, you’re basically describing me. If all of that is criteria for deserving to die off than I guess I don’t want to live anyway... But I AM as adorable as any panda out there, so I guess I’d probably also be spared by virtue of humanity’s squee reflex.

THIS IS THE CRAPPIEST MASCARA EVERY CREATED! there i said it.

THIS IS THE CRAPPIEST MASCARA EVERY CREATED! there i said it.

This post reminds me of something.

I just got up in that age range (I’m 42, my kids are 21) and I realized something as I was on vacation last week: I LIKE this shit! I really like not having to bat off 22 year old dudes or feel competitive with other women or have anyone give enough of a fuck about my koolaid for me to have to worry about the flavor.…

I think Louis CK said that, by the time you’re 40, no one cares about you. They just expect you to do your job. That’s about right.

Whoa whoa whoa... Can you for real actually dump the litter-covered poop and pee into the toilet bowl? I always assumed this would very quickly lead to some very serious plumbing problems.

Now I'm starting to think that the author didn't know that Val was married to Eddie. I mean ... that's the whole joke. Eric Stonestreet tells "some lady" to get out of the way. She turns around and it's the ex-wife of Van Halen's legendary guitarist, and mother of its current bassist. That's why it's funny!

...but it's not a foreign throne. It's a prop. That would be like saying the Titles and Nobilities Clause of the US Constitution prohibits Obama from being recognized as, say, an honorary Starfleet Captain.

That first sentence driving anyone else insane?!

Every time I read a Jaden tweet, this pops into my mind.

I usually subscribe to the Occam's Razor principle, which is why I believe that these people were intentionally infected with measles by Big Pharma in order to frighten people into getting vaccinated. Follow the money, sheeple.

I'll have to vote for last winter's jam, Carmex, but seriously? This goo from Bath & Body Works has kept my lips from falling off all this winter. I love it, and I wear it 24/7.

I'll have to vote for last winter's jam, Carmex, but seriously? This goo from Bath & Body Works has kept my lips…

It's time once again for the Gallery of Regrettable Food!