He is so very lovely, and even handsomer in person. He also smells nice, which is a weird thing to say about a person but he put his arm around me for the picture, and it was hard not to notice. He was incredibly kind.

OH MY GOD. I am mortified. I feel actual embarrassment. Not funny-I-waved-snacks embarrassment, but real, to the bone feelings. OH GOD.

He is a perfect human. I’m convinced he’s a robot, programmed for kindness.

Please laugh. Laughter is the only salve for my embarrassing, embarrassing wounds.

Scotchmallow is exactly right. It is the perfect flavor trifecta.

You beautiful butterfly, I bet it’s darling when it happens.

This endears you to me and I want to hug you.

OH MY GOD. I love this story. I bet he tells it to people. But as a fun story, because I bet he was delighted.

You might cringe forever. I am still cringing, 2 years later.

WHAT DID HE SAY

That is one hundred percent in line with my experience. A bunch of kids took a picture of him before me and apologized for bothering him and he was like, “Are you kidding me? This is the best, easiest thing in the world! Why wouldn’t I take a picture?”

It’s a great feeling. Just let the gentle caress of Spencer’s $1 million dollar crystal collection whisk you away into sweet oblivion.

Ok, so speaking of celebrities at Disneyland- one time I met Zachary Levi there, and he was quite possibly the NICEST human ever and he took a picture and was basically one hundred percent chill. Then I saw him later, and he gave me a head nod, unprompted, like a “Hey, I remember earlier today when you got all sweaty…

While we’re here, looking at action stills and beautiful thighs, haaaave we talked about Olympic Divers Photoshopped onto Toilets yet? It’s terrible. Awful. Humans are the worst. (But also I love it so much)

I am ungreying because I don’t want to yuck anyone’s yum and also that’s a very funny compilation of gifs.

At least I can trust and believe in something, and that thing is baby elephants with their face in the sand providing me excellent internet commentary. Thank you, baby elephant. <3

This is my favorite story anyone has ever told me.

I am actually Edith from Downton Abbey with googley eyes pasted on, so I am Very Concerned about this avatar scandal.

DAMN