I saw this too! I felt like it was a weird, hazy magic eye when I figured out I was just looking at a bathtub.

No doordash guilt. Doordash is how you do Saturday so right. You get it and you don’t look back.

I just doordashed an avocado crepe, there’s a football game later today, and now a weekend BCO. Is it my birthday? Am I about to die? Whatever. Good way to go out.

Red-tailed hawk? More like stone cold fox, amirite?

“There are three teaspoons in a tablespoon and also please kill me.”

And then within the reds and whites, if you want to get crazy with it, there’s different sizes and shapes depending on the type of red/white! I didn’t know this until recently, because I don’t bother to look before pouring it right into my face.

Acceptable serving size.

50% I’m a member of the Animorphs

BUT HOW MUCH IS 2 GLASSES, MAN? DON’T LEAVE ME IN SUSPENSE.

Poor guy probably encountered so many people that couldn’t do the math that he just straight gave up and added the 6 ounce/9 ounce breakdown to his spiel. Which makes me sad for everyone.

<3 <3 <3

Yes! Brains are the best. “It was you! Just not your face, because there wasn’t really a face, and you didn’t talk, but I knew it was you and we were at your house, but your house was a boat and also we weren’t there, but we were watching ourselves and I tried to punch you but the air was jello.”

I’ve never encountered that before! Usually it’s 1 size glass or carafe or bottle of varying sizes. I mean, it’s possible I’ve been given the choice, but my brain refused to acknowledge that there was even a 5 ounce option and just surrendered to the safety and comfort of an 8 ounce glass.

I have never been more fascinated by a serving of wine. How big was the large? Is it in a different glass? Did they confuse a white wine glass and red wine glass for small and large options? I am so curious about the whole situation. Curious and thirsty.

Holy crap. That is uncanny.

Of course! Right back atcha, doll.

I hope the conversation goes smoothly and isn’t too awful. I’ll send you lots of good vibes at the end of the month. Not that you need my totally scientific and definitely-a-real-thing vibes because you’re obvy a grade-A BAMF, but I’ll send good thoughts for a satisfying and easy conclusion anyway. <3

That is such a nice thing to say, thank you! I’m glad my penis adventure brought mirth to many.

I have done none butt stuff, but I’m not opposed to trying should the opportunity present itself.

I’m impressed with how centered you seem about it. I think I’m way too sentimental, and even when I know a relationship should end, l get nostalgic and like, Sarah Mclachlan starts playing over all my memories and I make…