"I'm as open as Naya's browser to Big Sean's IG account"

He's corny, yes...but Tyga levels? That's quite a claim.

I got to "NO CAR IS PERFECT HOWEVAR" and then I was like

An attorney at one of my old jobs had this on his wall, but it had some horribly tacky blinking LEDs on it, along the walkway to the house and on the cars' taillights.

Brands with at least ONE car under $50k that I would seriously consider buying:

I think it's ok if it's there from factory. Doesn't add or take away anything, even if it is silly. But if you add it yourself? Douche. That means you went out of your way to add another way to announce to the world that you're a douchenugget.

I'm willing to bet that you called someone a slughead at least once, and they were just like um...what?

Best terrible hacker ever.

Nostalgia wears off after a while. I played a game of Halo: CE in the MCC online yesterday. It's fucking awful. I have fond memories of the game, but Jesus, it's too dated.

What you're missing is that expansions in WoW come out every two YEARS or so, not every two months.

I fucking WANT those wheels. WANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNT.

Reminds me of the time that the starter fell out of my engine because one of the bolts broke off and the other had stripped threads, as I soon discovered. I ended up having to have a coworker turn the key while I physically held the starter in place with my hands to get the car started.

JESUS. That's intense.

Holy shit I do not want to spend more than a minute in the company of any of those people in that picture.

I chose to buy Lucky Raspberry over this thing the ONE time Xur was selling it (second week after release). I regretted it until I found/earned two of them.

Yep, waaaaay overpriced. He's probably trying to get back whatever he invested in the restoration. On an Oldsmobile that isn't a 442. lolno

As the owner of a mom who traded her '11 328i for a '12 Cooper S, I can tell you that there are people out there who will go for the Mini over the BMW.

You would have showed them what for, and any women in the vicinity would have taken note of this and offered sex.

Not all of us did.

Well, that's a shame. I'm sure you were going to buy one until you saw this.