I’d be more okay with this if they kept the Top Gear circuit and then built the houses around that. Who wouldn’t want to live on 69 Followthrough Way?

I’d like to slam that taco.

At least for the last guy, sure.

What a pathetic hill to die on. If they boycotted because a rapist(s) went unpunished, that would be awesome. I’d even happily accept boycotting a game because they don’t get paid. But to boycott in support of rapists?

How different is a moose from a camel?

Yeah, first thing that went through my mind when I saw that quote was Pearl Harbor...

Guerrero was the best bad-pitch hitter I’ve ever seen. I could swear there were one or hits in his career that came off pitches that bounced in front of home plate.

I’ve worked around college athletics for a long time, and I can say with absolute certainty that I have yet to meet a DI football coach that I would consider well-adjusted. They’re all myopic nutjobs. But Harbaugh really takes it to the next level.

If that was the case, Michigan would have inexplicably made it into the playoffs, been discounted by everyone, won, and then gloated until the next playoffs.

Have you ever considered introducing yourself over the phone as “Sargent, Jordan?”

The subterfuge was discovered last month. After being beaten by Louisville 44-12, Wake Forest discovered “materials” left behind that indicated Louisville was aware of plays that the Demon Deacons had never run before. Louisville coach Bobby Petrino thundered around about integrity, while Wake Forest announced they…

[Smacks forehead] Buh! I guess my first car as a teen was also in my old man’s name... But it wasn’t a 370Z. This is like giving your todder two buckets of open paint and letting him loose in a newly-remodeled kitchen.

So if people don’t do with their property what you want them to do with it you just steal it and fuck them for making something you want. Got it.

Samer,

Hundreds of thousands of angry, drunk fans with guns. What could possibly go wrong?

Jesus. I wish I was so damned wealthy that I could forget the name of the last Ferrari I bought.

How is “Resting bitchface” a thing but “conspicuous scumbagface” not? I mean, I can’t be the only one looking at these pictures and getting instantaneous “unpaid child support warrant” vibe?

Just imagine how she is going to react when someone tells her where pistachios come from...

When the thought, “waiting for the right time to break it to the internet” crosses your mind, it’s a powerful sign that you have made poor life choices.