Based on all my experiences with neurosurgeons, I’ve come to the conclusion that if, heaven forfend, I should ever develop a brain tumor, I’ll just keep it and name it George before I let this clown’s ilk tinker with my noggin.

I shall write in a candidate, then.

Proposal: if the two WC teams are tied, play best 2 of 3; if they’re not, the better record gets credited with a win going in (so play two to win one). I seem to recall the college WS does (or did) something similar with a double-elimination bracket. Mitigates the buzzsaw advantage of one ace pitcher on the “underdog”…

Marketing strategy: everyone gets one hash brownie each for $3, then all subsequent brownies, hash or otherwise, are $25.

Yeah, her fights are mostly *ding*—blur—opponent lies unconscious, Rousey collects check.

My experience with auto-flush toilets: 50% chance that someone will still somehow have managed to have left a floater (or worse), 100% chance that the damn thing will flush 5-6 times while I’m there.

Please do not disgrace my friend Roz with this comparison.

No real middle ground until the catcher picks up the ball. On a batted ball (as opposed to thrown), the runner must actively yield to a fielder making a play. Fail to yield and you’re out, whether you did your best to get out of the way or not. The classic example is a runner being hit by a fair batted ball: even if…

Accidental interference: he’s out, runners return. Intentional interference: he AND lead runner are out, trailing runner stays at first. Interference never really pays, and if you conveniently interfere right after your crap bunt set up a double play, the ump is unlikely to be charitable in determining intent.

Perhaps not the Harvard of the midwest, but the Oberlin of Wisconsin, at the very least.

Bear in mind: this is the crowd that thinks Josh Hancock jokes are hilarious.

Not a doctor, but sometimes mistaken for one, and you’re correct; “head contusion” refers to a superficial blunt injury to the head. Brain injuries are identified as such.

Problem is they don’t need the public’s faith; they can, and did, lock down a House majority pretty much without a single non-wingnut vote though gerrymandering. The Senate is pre-gerrymandered for their convenience, of course.

A million years ago, when I was a youth-league umpire, the ground rule was that if a coach was ejected (players rarely were, being 12), we did not resume play until the coach was out of visual range. If we waited more than two minutes, it was a forfeit. MLB might want to look into that.

We always have this in our back pocket if the wingnuts get out of hand.

My college had two paths to honors: GPA (3.4, 3.7, 3.9) and honors project. It was possible to get both, the latter being much rarer. The project honors standards were basically “would help you publish,” “would co-publish,” and “I already stole this and published under my name.”

Lest we forget, the Twinkie defense was that the defendant’s excessive consumption of Twinkies was a manifestation, not a cause, of mental disease (i.e. a guy known to have been a “my body is a temple” type was suddenly wolfing junk food). Possibly still bullshit, but more reasonable than the usual sugar-made-me-do-it…

1) This is not a playoff game; if the result holds, Cubs are still 5 back with 14 to play, so they’re a helluva lot closer to the links than the Cardinals are.

So, what, we should have a panel of players just sit in a jury box and decide whether a pitch was a mistake or intentional? No. Just say “you threw the ball, you’re responsible for where it goes” and have done with it. Or, we can continue with the absurdity of “team A accidentally hit a guy, but we now have…

Fact remains that Haren did hit Holliday in the head while Belisle did not hit Rizzo in the leg. If we take intent out of the equation (because it’s laughable that Maddon knows his guy made an oopsie straight into Holliday’s ear, but Belisle is a sniper who can hit the stitches on Rizzo’s trousers), then one of these…