Hey man, do you have a barf bag I can borrow? Used is OK, given the urgency of the situation.

Yeah, I’ve been meaning to apologize to you about that.

Came for the phalaropes, left disappointed.

The number of foul tips into the mitt was truly distressing.

You skipped the 5:30 AM post-workout meal???

[A] team does not have to actually be ass in order to be the Ass Team Of The Week.

Demanding, as an incoming freshman, that your future teammates never drink or smoke together seems like a great way to win over a locker room.

Nah, that’s what happens when you work at a Flying D.

Three electricity puns on 9/17/18. Pretty good output Faraday’s work.

Best part is that they’re standing in front of multifamily homes on nice tree-lined streets that you could expect to pay what, at least $700K to get a unit in.

[Dons Metro-West shades]: Oh, that is such a Middlesex County thing to do.

“We can accurately produce racism to within one one-thousandth of a just sayin, and our DILLIGAF-certified processes are compatible with established GADSDEN protocols.”

*woof*

Ohm not following.

And a sexual misconduct/attempted rape inquiry just might take long enough for the Dems to bring the number of Republican-controlled Senate seats down from 51 to 49 or so, and then into the recess. I can’t imagine WHERE they might have learned this!

Well, I mean, he covers it in Thursday’s power unit messages, so.

Fair-to-middling chance it’s not ice water.

Derek Jeter [views gif]: “Outstanding form. That’s what I’m looking for. That’s a winner’s mindset.”

What’s underrated?
I live in Bennington County, Vermont. Here’s the “best of” and it will not disappoint:

Meanwhile, Generalissimo Norm MacDonald’s career is still dead.