Oh god no! Only real freaks attend Rubbermade parties.

Rich people drink a lot.

I have a cousin who takes things literally too. He doesn’t like people in his space and wears ear muffs all the time.

Those checks from The General must drying up.

Trumpet face when you get caught. LOL!

Mandalorians are jingoist assholes. Not heroes.

“Lesbians, women, Blacks!? Are you trying to kill our advertising dollars marketed to the 67% of America we care about, right before elections!?”
- Hollywood

People are just not used to seeing normal sized 29 year olds.
I blame the increase in gravity and GMOs mutating people.

Wouldn’t be too hard to make a toast knife. Hot knives already exist. It would mean replacing the wire with a serrated blade.

I thought the photo had two guys getting hitched - which given the theme would have been either too on the nose or very appropriate?

Also if you have an Oscar Meyer wedding, is it still a wedding or a sandwich?

Ah yes, the “storyfication” of the internet. Batboy has nothing on today’s generation of fantasy narratives.

When our volcano erupted in 2009, we had to do all the listed above. We put panty hose over your air intake to keep the ash from entering.

What’s great is that this also applies to nuclear bombardment as well!

Michael Barnett, 38...
Sith age faster I guess. He looks like he could have gotten a 2 for 1 with his AARP card.

A priest is a priest. It was bound to come out sooner or later. Just like with Mother Theresa.

Well you know the saying, “One man’s terrorist is another’s elected offical carrying out generational ideals upheld since 1870.”

It’s a InfluencerCon-con. So they’ll all be there. In one big pit.

But-but without alcohol, the ATF will just be TF as in “The Fuck is this shi!?”
Booze is as American as guns and apple pie. How are you supposed to get through shitty decisions now? Face them sober like some kind of crazy person?!

Add to that his tag line of “Pause” anytime someone said something that might be construed as homoerotic, was a thinly veiled twist on the “no homo” language of the 90's. Since censors were after rappers for their homophobia in the 2000's, he rebranded it to duck their ire.

I once ate a whole bag of the Buffalo Bleu flavor and then threw up for an hour.
They’re so good.

WARNING: You have to bite each chip. If you try to toss a kettle chip into your mouth, it will cut you like prisoner.

Never forget: 2-27-2002