As a Cardinals fan, I just realized I’ll have to hear Giancardlo for at least 3 but possibly 10 years if he accepts the deal. Thanks for ruining my life.

This deserves some kind of Pulitzer

And here I thought Kinja’s Bear content hibernated during the winter.

You schmucks are leaving money on the table. I put all my savings into ByteCoin. 8 TIMES THE PROFIT!

The true Muerte Peluda...Colby and Lillian!

I get this a lot:

Wait wait wait...you think, after the wedding, you stop getting in trouble for having your own opinions, or sharing her opinion? You are ADORABLE.

This man is asking the right questions. Lately, Fridays have been more Bare than Bear. Who’s with me?

He had it coming back to him.

Squirt it on some D3 school with dry elbows.

Usually after being hit by a bad pitch, it’s not the pitcher charging. What a twist!

will keep the local systems in line...”

Plus, as much as fans may want more low-key Star Wars stories away from the Empire and Rebellion or the Jedi and Sith, a new movie trilogy is probably not the place for them. No one wants three two-hour movies about moisture farmers on Dantooine in the days before Leia tells Grand Moff Tarkin that’s where the secret…

-1 Lot Lizard

THE LOGISTICS OF LUNCH? Goff must have interned at TQL in college if that’s so hard...what a puss. Coordinate 50 truckloads of superload freight onto Long Island and then talk to me, you wimp.

I saw Cletus Safari open for Ted Nugent once. Those were dark days.

Modest Mouse covers belong in DUAN, Emma.

One would think it’d be more concerning if he recommended coarse sand from your nearby playground. Local, natural, and organic!

It took less than 24 hours for Houston sports fans to return to their baseline level of disappointment. That is one hell of an efficient correction.