SPF30 is some melanin haver shit. Us true day walkers require SPF50+

I am hereby christening Lupita the patron saint of flat-chested women. She is perfect and I will now sing praises to the small idol of her likeness I will keep nearby so that she will bestow her blessings upon me.

I had a coworker at my last job who was routinely furious that, even though I was fat and she wasn’t, I still allowed myself to enjoy food while she subsisted in Lean Cuisine and fat-free yogurt. It made her SO angry, and she just couldn’t shut up about it—she’d hover around my cubicle at lunch time and make comments…

Let me tell you about what life is like as a fat sexworker. My job involves sharing photos of myself as a strong, sexy, sexual woman, in varying degrees of undress. It involves me setting a figure - a not inexpensive one, either - on what I feel access to my body is worth.

This, for a myriad of reasons, makes some men…

Fat AND happy here. I’m just a few years and a few pounds more than you. I love fashion and have clothing, shoes, and accessories that I love and tend to err to the side of “dressy” in most situations. I love to wear makeup and try out new hairstyles. I am also pretty outgoing and a performer. My skinny to average…

My first exposure to a gin and tonic, long before I came of age, was the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy joke about how every civilization in history has had a drink called a “jynnan tonix” or something similar.

Nor that it wasn’t popularized by that stupid song.*

I have really hooded eyes, so its hard to see my looks. This youtuber is one of my faves, and she’s an aesthetician so she’s great for skin info.

I choose this as my Mom story:

My MUM.

When I was in 5th grade I changed schools. My new school was way on the other side of town and outside of the lily white suburb where my previous school had been located.

I was about 12 when I’d decided I was going to be a Paleontologist (I’m not, btw, but that’s not the point.)

My mom worked in the music business during its hey day (80s and 90s) and has some kick ass stories. Some of my fave stories include: when Bob Dylan stepped in dog poop at our house after being rude to the always kind Steve Perry, when my mom brought a bottle of whiskey to Slash’s laundromat to bribe him to go with her…

My mom is the mom that gets hella joy out of making me feel like a bad daughter.

My mom is a transplanted Midwestern lady living in a small island town in south Texas. There are a lot of great stories I could tell about her (she was briefly Mormon because the only church within walking distance of her family’s farm was a Mormon temple and then she got a scholarship to BYU and, as she likes to tell…

So my stepfather had just died, and my mother was alone in the house. Some really dodgy-looking Travellers (that we didn’t know) came to the door and said “Your husband hired us to clean your furniture, can you help us get it into our van?”

My little sister came home one day sobbing and said “my friend hung himself.” My mom patted her on the shoulder and said, “hanged.”

Yeah, I find that it takes a week or so and then if I see tiny whiteheads on my forehead, I know it’s clogging my pores. Good luck!

Straight up, I order from Korea. The Asian Beauty subreddit has so much information on products and sellers. Come. Hold my hand. I’m happy to enable to you.