Pretty Girls is the worst song I have ever heard in my entire life.

Eighteen years later, and I still can’t determine which was worse - the gummed up chicken strips or the overturned pasta. Also - no one ever learned how or why the pasta was overturned in the first place.

It’s a crossover event.

Slightly off topic, but...can we just talk about his hair for a quick sec? Is it turning yellow? Does he apply a special tint to achieve that locked-in-a-cigarette-smoke-filled-room yellowish tinge?

Folks of all ages love to complain that their food is cold, when at the very least, it’s not hot. It’s amazing to me that for the majority of restaurant patrons, there is no middle ground. Everything is boiling hot or ice cold. Everything was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING! or THE WORST EXPERIENCE I’VE EVER HAD IN MY ENTIRE LIFE.

My first restaurant job was at a Red Robin back in 1997. This was when Red Robin was still kind of fun. Now it’s a clown factory. But anyway. I waited on an elderly couple who did the following:

Self loathing’s a hell of a thing. Looking at you, Clarence Thomas.

I’ve been working on a spell to conjure the spirits of Nat Turner, Malcolm X, Frederick Douglass, and Sojorner Truth. I will allow their spirits to inhabit my body and then I will give Clarence Thomas the ass-whooping he deserves.

Mama...I just killed a man.

Shia, honey...is that a braid?

I knew it! I KNEW women did that shit just to prove a point. That whole “I’m going to order another glass of wine...and then a coffee....and then a dessert...and then wait another 30 minutes to pay my bill, just to prove that I can sit here as long as I want.” Not to mention you make your dining companions wait while…

Because it makes him uncomfortable. It calls attention to the fact that either a.) Eats like a fucking Hoover, or b.) his tablemate is slow as molasses. Either way, HE doesn’t want to be placed in the awkward position of everyone not doing everything at the same time. It drives me nuts. He’s no different than the…

People, man. They’ll essentially agree on the main point but will fight a stranger to the death over some bullshit semantics.

This teacher’s gotta go.

You’ve gotta go.

Of course it’s still flying. Their racism is so deeply ingrained that it doesn’t occur to them that’s it’s actually racism. They see the flag as a part of their history — not for the traitorous, racist symbol it actually is. The disconnect there is beyond huge.

Thank you. Describing her as mentally ill negates her personal responsibility, it, in essence, excuses all of her very conscious choices and actions. I do not accept this.

You’re reaching. The original statement was in relation to blacks as slaves, not people ever enslaved in America.

Looks like we need to start replacing those “Keep Calm & Carry On” signs with ones that read, “It’s Not The Same As Caitlyn Jenner.”

Raven Fucking Symone. You know...I actually felt bad for her when she got all that backlash for not claiming African American, and saying she sees herself as black (in a subsequent interview). I don’t like the term African-American either, I, too prefer to be called black.