This just reminded of something from my childhood. My uncle had an F-250. He literally rattle-canned his pickup safety orange.

Don’t feel bad, Knights, when I was in high school it took a lot less than a Miracle to keep me from scoring.

You might say it’d take.... An act of God.

I love it when kickers get to be heros for doing non-kicker shit.

Holy fuck there was no way I thought that kid was gonna catch him.

I don’t really have “Donald Trump is president” moments anymore. I mean, I kind of do, but now they manifest themselves as “tens of millions of Americans supported and continue to support Donald Trump as president” moments.

My wife had to take me to the ER last month (I was very out of it, long story too boring to get into), and of course they ask the “is he with it” questions—what is your name, what year is it...and the third question was “Who is our president?”

Little known fact: Sir Edmund Hillary sat down after summitting Everest and was immediately pooped on by a bird.

Ben Roethlisberger introduced the players’ three choices

Alas, those 500 (well it was more like 415-416) Halcyon Days of Yore can never truly be recaptured, but surely there’s some z-list celeb somewhere who can take her place.

Today on 500 Days of Kristin: what is going on with her boobs in that dress? It is like they are mad at one another.

Nooooooooo! That was the worst.

This picture just made me deeply sad and nostalgic. I still mourn Gawker.

God I used to refresh Gawker repeatedly every afternoon at work anticipating the latest installment of 500 days. Everyday was Krismas.

Speaking of the “book author,” can we please bring back the 500 days of Kristin series; for old trolling times sake?

These days, at least this year, a US Navy Ship returning to home port under her own power and not having rammed another ship or ran aground is enough to fly a “Mission Successful” banner....

Yeah, well, you can’t go around being afraid all the time. I mean, if I let my fear control me, I wouldn’t have asked one of the most popular girls in 6th grade if she wanted to ‘go’ with me. But I muttered the 6th grade version of ‘fuck it’ to myself, and asked her, and now look at me! 35 years later, still scarred…

My wife pointed out to me that the class of submarine they show in the movie is the Russian Akula class. They literally jump the shark (akula in Russian) right there in the trailer.