Agreed! But he should never get out of prison.

Why'd didn't you include the slo-mo replay of the highlight if both calls were disputed?

“DUCK SEASON!! FIRE!!”

Three thousand dollars. For a Diamondbacks ticket. What would have to happen for you to get your money’s worth at that fucking game?

/dying

Right? There’s assholes flipping bananas on the field all over Europe, and these balloon heads decide to call the team “Silverbacks”? In Atlanta?! There's nine (9) black guys on the team, for chrissakes!!

Sounds expensive. I still prefer this approach:

Your 2015 Cincinnnati Reds! How much stealing are we gonna do this year? We already stole an “n” from the Washigton Nationals!

A moose once bit my sister...

Looks like we got some gahbage.

Is it still Augusta policy to not show holes 1-9 on television?

This is great. +1

Those thumbs. Like he's waving two hotdogs at you.

How long would it take for a dog to die from starvation?

When I was drinking? Probably getting hit on by me.

Thanks. I wonder why they don’t follow baseball’s minor league system? This is America, man. If a team wants to sign you out of high school to play any sport, you should be able to get in the bus leagues and have the opportunity to work your way up to the bigs. For money. That way, the guys who want to go to college,…

Jesus, how many Virginia Slims do you have to smoke to make your mouth look like that?

How did LeBron James and Kobe Bryant avoid having to play in college before joining the NBA? There were a couple more, too, right? Not being a smart ass. I really don't know.

/fucking dying

You're not wrong. He even called himself "the original O.J." (not in a light-hearted way, either) in Crüe's Behind The Music episode while discussing how he bought his way out of going to prison for killing his friend in that DUI accident.