I thought The Alienist was that Oscar bait Adrien Brody movie directed by Ridley Scott.

*Jay Leno sits alone in the dark, sharpening a knife, waiting for the correct moment to strike*

I mean, is it even Star Trek if it doesn't feature Spock riding a hover board and punching a dude repeatedly in the face?

I've never knowingly heard them.

The scene where Catherine Keener tries to seduce Josh Gad but he's too distracted playing Pokemon Go will be a classic.

Everyone knows the way to a woman's heart is through harassment and petty litigation.

I had peameal bacon at the St. Lawrence and bacon it was not. But it was good.

In most regards Canada does things better than us, but Snoop opening for Linkin Park is about as wrong as Canadian bacon.

Wishbone Tomahawk

*Jay Leno stares blankly into a mirror wearing an ill-fitting orange wig as Goodbye Horses plays in the background*

People who were born closer than us to the actual big bang.

Stranger's Things

Now the only question is, will he be Chewbacca Mom'd or Ken Boned?

Nerdrage 1, Getting Some 0.

Only a Satanist would want that job.

Rocky Road!

In the next installment, we'll do a police welfare check on Tub Girl.

Whitewalkers dance like this… and Blackwalkers dance like this..

His catchphrase is, "I wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

President Trump stands on a phone book behind a gold spray painted podium