The scariest part about the Walmart car sales is “get financing here” aspect.

I wish I could remember where I read it for proper crediting, but the best description of Texans vs. Raiders is “A playoff game with zero playoff implications.”

As an Eagles fan I just am thankful the Titans were utterly insane and turned down the ludicrous king’s ransom Kelly offered for the chance to draft Mariota, lest the damage he did to my team be that much more catastrophic.

If being a rampaging dickhole disqualified one from the Hall, there’d be some major plaques missing.

And if your only reason for not voting for a defines-era-at-the-position, any-reasonable-human-would-call-him-a-lock player is “well, *nobody* should be a unanimous vote” then your voting pen should be hammered up your urethra by a blind cobbler

I usually had to go out alone and “one man band” so the tiny car was easier to toss around and left the bigger cars for two-person teams.

It was. When it went back for an oil change the dealer asked “what have you been DOING to this poor thing?”

In my TV reporter days I’d always grab the keys to the Justy — a Justy the local car dealer threw in FOR FREE when we bought three Legacy wagons — and it never let me down.

Having grown up in a certain era, I was always 100% convinced the ultimate car was the 1977 Pontiac Trans Am, complete with gold screaming chicken on the hood.

Thanks!

Crap, I was too slow on the draw for my version of the exact same question.

Stupid question: Is there a loss of seat-folding-into-floorability with all the extra stuff to make it a hybrid?

I once dropped a big bottle of Olive Oil that shattered on my kitchen floor, splashing everywhere and turning me into Adrian trying to keep my feet on the ice rink while screaming at the kid and the dog to stay out of the kitchen lest my wife come home to Vesuvian fountains of blood.

Are you implying the 10-year-old Nissan Quest I saw this morning really isn’t a Type-R?

Good. This was like Ben Roethlisberger showing up to quarterback the Pitt Panthers at Heinz Field on Saturday “to get some reps in”

I guess “Xtreme WACK Crash Pad 2.0" didn’t focus-group well

Concerning Todd Gurley, I’d like to also suggest DeSean Jackson be fed feet-first into Tomsula’s hobo chili fire for having one great “I’M BACK” week, being ranked ludicrously high ever week since, and delivering exactly one half-point more last week than I did, and my old fat ass was on the couch shotgunning Sweet…

Who the fuck has time to worry about the proper accessorization of a diaper bag with my cargo shorts when 118% of my brain is focusing on keeping a two-year-old from running into traffic with a flaming magnesium hammer shrieking about Goofy?

Who’d have thought Steve Carlton’s white supremacist survivalist rantings would only make him the SECOND-craziest ex-Phillies pitcher? 

My tailgate was about 20 cars to the right of this