Husky and Starch
MorningMartinis
morningmarteenies
That’s a whole helluva lot of mental illness going on, I’m sure. You can’t feed your children, but you’ve also got 20 dogs? What in the actual fuck?
American Kinja Warrior.
“I don’t wanna see you texting your boyfriends or your girlfriends,” she said. “I don’t wanna see you catching any Pokémons up in this bitch.”
How else are you supposed to Train your Pokemon?
I KNEW she lied. I love Kanye but he doesn't have enough shame to bother to lie about this.
2? That’s nothin’. Darryl was taking 8 balls.
Perfection. Well done Jezebel, well done.
“You see, Jenny, our Air Conditioner broke so we need to get a new one. So we’re going on a magical adventure.”
Good. The Universe is punishing you for your blasphemy.
UPDATE: my new air conditioner broke in the box.
Well ain’t that some shit.
Wondo’s mom brings the orange slices for halftime sooooo
Today in Alternate Future History:
Go fuck yourself.
Oh, I thought this was going to be about ordering enough food to feed 4 people and then yelling to your imaginary family “Food’s here!” so that the delivery guy doesn’t think you’re a loser ordering a single serving of orange chicken on a Friday night.
they eat mosquitoes by the truckload though