Type his name and “Mmm yeah” into YouTube, press play, and back off 5 feet or so and make sure there’s nothing throwable in your vicinity. Also, her name and “singing in the shower,” if you really want the joy of comparing the cultural influences on preteen girls/guys.

It took me a second to remember, but I believe these are the artists behind “Mmm Yeah” and “Singing in the Shower” (both of which are apparently actual radio singles) so this is probably a step up for both of them (I refuse to actually watch the video). I think I've joined team old, and I'm not even 25... (Would I…

I think it might be keep it, pretty please. Which is marginally better.

Do you have one that's gluten-free?

I’m not sure it’s possible to even think the word “fingerbanging” without giggling. At least not for me.

Or just require a longer algorithm due to too many potential variables.

“She say she won’t, but I bet she will”. Nope.

I dunno, the runners at least look they're having a ball... or possibly a blast.

I would have thought someone with the name Joan of Snark could appreciate a little dry humor. I guess he should have ordered the Sauvignon Blanc.

Please let this place be near me so I can go shake this wonderful man’s hand and buy him a drink.

It’s official: my bucket list now includes the use of the phrase “what’s the deellio with your kay-sah-deellios?

I thought up a fun game to play while reading the comment section. Get a list of commonly mispronounced words, especially those which would be more typically known with higher social status. Research the origin, and go back three or four variations and learn the pronunciation, provided that is different from the…

So... everyone's giving this a straight reading?

Yep. She was under the influence of runner’s high, so she obviously couldn't consent ;).

The way I interpreted it was skeevy as all get-out, but that may have been because of the guy I knew who enjoyed singing it.

Male privilege is the ability to get a lot of nice things. Cis privliege is the ability to enjoy them.

She doesn’t want men switching gender boxes, but she also wants them to stay within a fairly cramped bearded-manly-men box. She’s just being sure to get all her ideas on gender out there at once.

Every pastor needs to have a great “eye of the needle” sermon ready for things like this. It should be like the thesis for divinity school.

This makes me want to believe that he is secretly a ninja, and his mastery of high speed movement and hallucinogenic chemicals allows him to go unnoticed impersonating an entire tour bus full of people simultaneously.

Related idea: dance routine to Nicki Minaj’s Anaconda on, in, and around the Lincoln Memorial, remixed with a rap interlude by a Winfield Scott impersonator.