Oh, come on now, that one kid got “NOMINAL” and another got “BATHOS”. If I were the other kids I’d be side-eyeing the shizz out of them.

Yes.

***SPOILER ALERT***

I went on a few dates back in the day with the director of the film Zoo (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zoo_(film…) and he was a nice enough fellow and all, but I just couldn’t get over how much anti-squick factor it would have taken to make a film like that (I could never even bring myself to watch it) and I just knew…

No they aren’t. And it’s obvious that you don’t know what you’re talking about because Marilyn is THE MUST SMUG of everyone!

Thanks. BUT THE CHEESE STICKS! HOW I MISS THEM!

I choked once when I was alone in a hotel room (TMI: I ate cheese sticks and like a half hour later I got really sick and threw them up, only they came up as a ball of cheese that lodged in my windpipe). I panicked for a second and then I ran into the bathroom and gave myself self-Heimlich (basically you ram the same…

Except that I think he was joking?

It’s not, really. I mean, when I’ve published on Gawker, I did get myself a semi-expensive pair of boots. And I love those boots. But can you imagine trying to live on that for a personal essay that takes time to put together?

No. They pay $250.

More or less trashy than someone who supports an open racist? Just curious!

I think I’ve watched too much true crime crap in my lifetime because my first thought when I heard about this was “Poor little baby, my god, those monsters” and my second thought was “It’s quite convenient that the mother is out of the country...OH GOD NOW YOU’RE THE MONSTER, MOOSEYDEERS.”

This bothered me, too, but really it says “or formula” and if you make the choice to move across an entire continent from the baby’s father, you better be ready to compromise on the feeding, too. While breast is best, often, it’s not the end all, be all to raising a healthy child, by any means.

When I was four, I went miniature golfing for the first time on a family vacation and, not realizing there was a difference between this and the golfing I’d seen on TV, attempted to drive my first ball down the putting green. Which actually meant I caught my mom in the eye with my putter and she ended up at the…

Yeah. This is how I eat ‘em, too. It makes them last longer!(note that accompanying photo isn’t supposed to make sense)

Oh you are dumb. Like really really dumb. Got it!

I believe the “so what” is explained over and over again for you....

There have been A LOT of articles about just this. How nobody at (was it Harvard?) liked him. The ones with his old roommate are especially worth checking out.

We need a break from the complaining. YOU SHOULD SEE OUR AMERICAN FACEBOOK NEWSFEEDS. It’s all complaining.

I think the National Enquirer or one of those wrote about how she’s at death’s door.