(Terrelle Pryor throws #MakeHueSmileAgain cleats in the trash can)

4918th verse, same as the verse: there is no point trying to reason with or understand them, just outnumber them*

I always applaud adding new and exotic sports the stable of Deadspin writers knows nothing about to the old and tired sports the stable of Deadspin writers knows nothing about.

The only decent crew is the NBA TV crew, TNT is 90% clowning on each other’s clothes (and then re-clowning due to some crack Photoshopping by TNT’s video department) followed by an easily negated Charles Barkley verbal excretion.

(at press conference)

Lower league soccer low-lights, the ‘make me an offer table’ (a wobbly card table that smells of mildew) at a shitty multi-family garage sale.

Moved my Astros to the AL in favor of his Brewers, automatically out in the Hall of Fame of my mind.

I wonder how much the Selig family had toupee them to influence the decision.

Hardlyrevelatory.com is still available if jezebel starts getting stale.

(post-game)

(gets extension from Kroenke until the heat death of the universe)

“Not well” -- every townie in East Lansing that doesn’t know who he is in a bar

This is less a Transformers sequel and more Will Ferrell’s Bewitched or Buster Poindexter’s Car 54, Where Are You?

“And they way that they wear a ring signifying that they’ve won a championship... that’s just gay as hell. You won’t find any rings on me.”

At least Uncle Uri is a master mesmerist.

This doesn’t make any sense... 7 original seasons + 1 new season ≠ the 9 circles of hell.

I heard there’s an epidemic of people down there who have been gotten by rhythm, ignoring State Health Commissar Gloria Estefan’s warnings

Help, I’m Tangled Up in Blue and I Can’t Get Up

Way to fully convince the aliens that there’s nothing of value on the planet worth preserving before demolition to make way for that hyperspace bypass

Maybe the poor in cold climate locations can burn printed out Richie Incognito reclamation articles and articles about such articles in lieu of being provided low-cost heating oil in winter