They thought Yordano Ventura was pitching tonight.

Omg it’s not food related, but my favourite Nihilist Twitter person is KimKierkegaardashian. @KimKierkegaard :

Nope. I mean, it’s Valdosta, which is in one of the shittiest parts of Georgia (my dad lives in nearby Cairo, the ACTUAL shittiest part of Georgia—and that’s saying something).

We also have a Vienna, but we pronounce it “Vy-enna.” We say stuff good.

Like sexual intercourse between two humans, Baseball is a game of rhythm and inches. Your greatest adversaries are your own mind and body. Both may include spitting.

This is Jose Canseco and a thesaurus.

These read like a very strong attempt to pass the Turing test.

Huh. I didnit know there was a Kay-Row in Georgia as well; we have one here in Illinois, the most southern city in the state.

(4) secretly report the guy to the IRS so he gets audited but never knows it was you that did it.

Is that you, Delonte?

Mine has a documentary:

cc: your mom

He has a better beard than me, is in better shape than me, AND he’s a trailblazer. What a jerk.

“Keep that p***y tight while I’m gone.”

I don’t remember black people being so shiny and vapid.

“When I can’t afford it on my pay, I don’t want people on the taxpayer’s dime to afford those kinds of foods either.”

List of approved items;