My sister just finished her chemo treatments without cracking a smile once, so I guess she’s a failure.

Please don’t cash it until the end of the month when I get paid. Thanks!

And it must be killing him because photos of the 5 former presidents are more newsworthy than any garbage that spews out of his mouth.

He’s plotting how to take all 5 down in one epic tweet.

Who is the Magical Black person? The Wise Old Black Woman? The Sassy Black Sidekick? The Welfare Queen? The Black Star Athlete? The Smart Young Black Guy who wears glasses? The Fat Grinning Black Guy who is always joking? The Uncle Tom?

As far as I understand the story; a group of people led by a White man keep stumbling upon or joining random communities, Atlanta, The Farm, The Prison, Terminus, Alexandria and manage to fuck things up so badly they must leave and seek another refuge. Any Black character seems to meet an untimely death except for the…

...Sorry, but no unaccompanied ladies

No Earthquake? With Sensurrsound!

and at least they didn’t say that it was “the price of freedom”

I saw the ad, thought it was bland. I save my red hot rage for things like Trump’s latest bile output. I’m never been disappointed.

Agree wholeheartedly. I watched the trailer and I now need a shower.

Surprised he didn’t go for the classic, “The dog ate my homework”

I love ice cold whole milk especially on my cereal. I try to limit my intake but cold milk=delicious. It’s my go to meal when I don’t have time to make dinner.

“Your name is Donald and you are the president” is taped to his bathroom mirror.

After her meltdown/shit show in previous years it is nice to see her being normal. When someone comes back from the brink it’s always good news.

I worked with a full colonel who called his wife “Mom” along with their kids. He was a very nice guy but when he referred to “Mom” it was skin shivering.

To save time at work, people scooped ice with their unwashed bare hands rather than using the scooper. One coworker used to take his water bottle and drag it through the ice to get the cubes into it. The only time the ice machine was cleaned was because it was broken.

Just look at those white socks!

I love donkeys. They are the assholes of the equine world. Doesn’t look like there are enough donkeys but will still go see it.

Well, they can wipe their tears away with those paper towels.