Wow, you got them all right, in the correct order, the first time! Deadspin writers always fail at that.

Welcome back Emma!

Formal request: Jezebel Foodspin post/blog/recipe

Like, Literally... What did I just watch?

Last year, in the span of one (1) bus stop, I saw a guy leave a bar, puke, fall in his puke, stand up, slip in his puke, and fall back down again. I think he was asleep in it by the time I left.

My husband and I fucking love Not Safe with Nikki Glaser. It’s a refreshing show.

That header image is my life right now. Me trying to internet, while Mr. annoyingly humps me.

Public places.

My weirdest turn-on...hm. Licking my feet is one thing. Gosh I love having my feet licked. When they’re clean, of course, but still, feels so good. Or having my fingers sucked. I’m not sure why, but digits + tongue = great.

Kinda weird, because I, as a man, kinda like the smell of my pits too. I’ve heard that it’s one of the points on the body that a lot of pheromones come out of. Apparently the most pheromones are released, or best time to smell them pits, is after a sweaty work out.

I’m an armpit gal, and I always have been. I’ve been weirding out boyfriends with my armpit sniffing for years. It’s especially good if they’ve been working in the sun all day, or haven’t showered in a while. Smelly, hairy, manly armpits are literally like sex drugs to me; they not only make me horny, they make me…

Huh. My wife likes to smell my armpit before sex. I didn’t realize that was a thing. The internet. Making things that might seem weird, not so weird.

You are an ahole if you didn’t enjoy this.

Don’t see the word “comedienne” used much nowadays.

I’m a professional Domme. I would consider BDSM to be an integrated aspect of my sexuality, rather than a “fantasy,” though nothing against those who are able to dip in and out. I am in the enviable position of having my boyfriend be my long term Submissive, while taking clients, on and off. We are both poly, though I…

Two lesbians, probably. Sisters. I’m just watching.

Because it’s your fantasy, you are in control. So it’s all OK. Everyone has fantasies that they wouldn’t want to happen in real life.

Where are these bangable mailmen you always hear about? Mine have always been friendly but geeky older white guys named “Gordy”.