Has your sister ever been evaluated for hypoglycemia? It’s an issue for both me and my mum- I figured it out, and now can tell when it’s happening, but for a long time my mum didn’t realize that’s what was going on, and would be super shitty to people when she was hungry.

If I had to deal with that first Starbucks guy, my only pleasure in life would come from willing the butterfat in that drink to solidify directly in his aorta.

It actually sounds like the kind of place Jean-Ralphio would open (although perhaps without the rapey bits).

I think I would need a shower just by going to “Happy Endings.”

Happy Gilmore.

See also- the Zagat’s sketch.

The Belgian-style waffles you get in the US are closer to a Brussels waffle. The Liege waffle is something different.

“Shoot straight, you bastards!”

Farley stole so many scenes on SNL, it’s amazing that Sandler could even be in the same room with him.

Again, it’s got some flaws, but Anthony Hopkins and Jessica Lange are both stellar in it.

I would go with “spray” in that scenario.

“Uh, yeah- these doves are a total health code violation.”

That sounds really amazing.

If I am every in Minneapolis again, I will go there. I love a classic steakhouse.

I don’t know what happened to my last picture there, but here’s another one:

Now, a lot of people here are going to try and sell you on American-style waffles, with all their toppings and things- which are perfectly fine, mind you.

That Au Bon Pain employee was way cooler than I would have been.

The Doors are like chicken pox- you have to get over them before you’re 14 or they can cause you some real problems.

I want my Creed CD back. You can keep The Doors.

THE SPICE MUST FLOW