That’s nothing! My Power Wheels was basically worth nothing when I sold it, despite the custom racing stripes I added with Jiffy Marker and Wite-Out!

Oops, All Mustangs!

Pro Tip: Disguise yourself as a Spongebob Squarepants or Yoda backpack.

The Plane Train is only one of those things!

I did the same thing, but it was side-by-side to fit my corpulousness and also it was two Malaise-era Pontiacs.

“We would like to buy a Tesla.”

Will people ever learn? While it’s good that the toddlers weren’t hurt, they should not have been driving in the first place!

Those are also the feet when it switches to gerwalk or battroid mode!

The definition of Hell on Earth is me and my family trapped on a ship with thousands of people just like me and my family.

[Hyundai-Kia HQ, interior. The CEO and his Board are gathered around the big table in the good conference room up on Seven.]

Toyota: We Build Excitement!*

The family should keep demanding more and more. OceanGate won’t be able to take the pressure!

Wow! It’s so fast that the outside went all melty!

The truck tried to stop, but the road was still slippery from that barbeque sauce tanker truck crash.

Pull out the Starliner, blow on the contacts, then push it back in, dummy!

If all this Tolerance keeps up, there won’t be any place left for assholes!

1st of December: Set up tree, put stockings above fireplace, place reindeers and sleigh on roof, swap out charging cable for Christmas lights.

Pass!

I’m going to start using that as a euphemism.

Why get a golden egg every once in a while when you can get them all at once?