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9/28/16

Funny, Adrian Peterson’s son’s face is imprinted on his cleats too.

9/27/16

“They won’t take the risk to exhibit their free speech in a way that places their circumstance in jeopardy, so let them get out of uniform and do their protesting on somebody else’s nickel,” he said.

9/27/16

“Williams? Yeah right. Let’s see a birth certificate. Lando Calrissian didn’t even have a girlfriend.”

9/27/16

She put a dye pack in her pants for funsies?

9/25/16

Half iced tea/ half cocaine?

9/25/16

That’s half-rum, half-bourbon, half-vodka, right?

9/22/16

I mean, pumpkin spice lattes only come around so often, but damn.

9/21/16

Jet fuel can’t melt Kaep’s resolve

9/19/16

Safety first. If you consider all of the nuclear energy stored in all of the atoms in his body, he is potentially the largest bomb in human history. Can we afford to take that chance?

9/19/16

“Enemy combatant” is a complete chicken-shit way to escape having to provide the rights and protections of criminal justice or prisoner of war status to someone.

9/19/16

The constitution doesn’t apply to brown people. I don’t know how often real Americans need to explain this simple truth until libruls get it.

9/19/16

Jet fuel can’t melt Pete Caroll’s bank account, but the NFL can.

9/19/16

$2.5M is only 5% of $50M.

9/19/16

“Bootstraps and Bloody Sox: Turning Fame into Fortune into Failure into Memes”

9/19/16

Bad
Entrepreneur
Negotiated
Generous
Handout
Allowing
Zealous
Industrial-fallout

9/19/16

Well, he shouldn’t have opened that many studios, duh!

9/15/16

after 9/11 my extended family designated a relative in California for everyone to call in case anything of that scale (in terms of cell phone usage all at once) ever happens again because NY-NY or NY-CT/NJ calls wouldn’t go through but people could make calls from NY to farther-away states

9/15/16

I didn’t “feel unified” the night of 9-11-01, because I was paralyzed and silent while quietly wondering if my uncle was alive and not wanting to ask my parents because I figured if they knew, they’d tell me.

9/14/16

A man who was paid handsomely without producing anything of value has nothing left to learn in Silicon Valley.

9/8/16

Do you have to stand if you’re shitting?