I find that if you withhold food from the help, they'll clean up just about anything.

D- Rusty Dessert, So., Utica
Double marks for being an awesome Lacrosse name, and a putrid sex act I will gladly pay extra for.

Coincidentally, $11,ooo is the exact sum Marge Schott used to pay Larkin to allow her to tap on his head and say "is this thing on?"

The Psalm Bradys.

There will definitely be some diving going on, if you catch my drift. (Oral sex on a lady)

You're a little late to the party, Francine.

#handsupdontroot (vegetables)

Everyone knows you don't call a straight roll, play action especially in traffic. Mike Shula should be taken to task on this one.

Better yet, what the fuck happened to your face Tom?

"Ohio? I'm afraid you're mistaken Mr. O'Neal .It's 'Cheerio.'

Then they would have landed in hospital where they would have undoubtedly hurled drunk invective and wanton advances at several Candy Stripers, leading to a predictable Jezebel post.

A) They don't have fucking passports you idiot, they're snakes.

2) They're snakes. They can't cross the Mississippi without a boat.

Guess you didn't pay attention in Biology either.

.

Milk snake? In Saskatchewan? Someone didn't pay attention in Biology. Specifically the part of the year, (I believe it was third semster, Grade 11) where they discussed snakes that are indigenous to North America. HAD you been paying attention to this particular lesson plan, and not oggling the shirt off of Pam…

Angel Of Cat Breath

It's all a misunderstanding. For example, 'Retard' in french means 'late'. Similarly, when referring to Messi as a 'retard' en espanol, they simply mean that Messi is a fucking dimwit who pisses his pants on public transit, and gets into spitting fights with other retards. It's a cultural thing.

He looks like Tom Ley in Grade 5, before he had his stomach stapled.

I was hoping this ended with Crawford rushing the stage, grabbing the mic and belting out Freebird, before careening off like an inebriated top, knocking over all the sound equipment.

Lance Stephenson On Top Of Hornets Coach:

Missouri: Don Lemon Harangued Pie