Are adults actually like this? I’ve never been turned down because I was menstruating. Even by new partners, first dates, one night stands, etc. Periods aren’t a gushing continuous flow, yeah there are heavier days but chances are it’s pretty minimal during the act unless you’re fucking Sting for like 12 hours. Y’all…

Also Franco is pushing 40, and he’s still playing a millennial? (Co star is 22, natch)

I’m bitter, but I’m also fairly sure that award was more about several generations of bro’s feelings and not so much about Bob Dylan himself. So, in short, *fart noise*.

What about papa pronounced pup-paaah. And of course the full formal maman for mother? My dad called his parents ma and pop, I think it’s pretty cute but may be a regional thing.

Good thing 1969 was just around the corner. Maybe this is our Year One! Hail Adrian! Hail Satan!

This commercial has been infuriating me lately. Besides the obvious diamonds are gross and useless, this is everything that’s terrible. Marketing to all the burning man type late twenties early thirties, probably already divorced from a first impulsive marriage now into poly-kinda relationships they say are about…

was it this goat?

Ololyga!

Counterpoint, these are amazing and I want the black one on the bottom right. I’m 5'3 and I haven’t worn an unwire bra for the past four years. Fitted things make me feel so weird. That androgynous monk aesthetic make me feel good in my body. I’m pretty much only wearing tunics, sack dresses and cut off denim overalls…

I’ve decided that Arthur Russell’s “That’s Us/Wild Combination” would be my first dance song. Its not really possible to slow dance to, you could just bob and shimmy really. Which is one small part of the many reasons why I will never get married.

He looks like an elder Riff Raff. This isn’t just age, this is stylistic choices.

If you haven’t read Caudia Rankine’s “Citizen” yet, please do yourself a favor and get it! Her piece on Serena Williams left me both crying and yelling at the book several times. If anyone has reason to be pissed it’s Serena Williams, beat the shit out of that racket, Serena, do whatever you want to do.

My big accomplishments this week are a little shallow, but fuck it. I spent most of my early twenties in some kind of serial monogamy, but after my last big break up I’ve promised myself to spend some time alone and generally be-a-slut-do-whatever-you-want. After about a month of being super down, I’ve been doing…

Ugh, I wanted to like Amy Schumer so much. For so many years I avoided watching comics bc I thought they were all jocky, shithead bros. Like any other simple animal, sometimes I just want to get my laugh on. There are a few female and non bro comedians I absolutely love, and obviously it’s pointless to try to find…

Cripes, I didn’t say reproductive abuse and coercion don’t exist. I know it does, but it usually happens to women. My point was that poking holes in condoms is kinda an overwrought misogynistic fear about crazy ladies stealing precious sperm.

That gif is strange and only seems to play into the (fairly irrational) fear of condom sabotage. Isn’t the concern more that the condom would break from friction? Maybe that gif would look too unappealing.

Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t hatefully lash out at people about their body size. Like, what’s with the body shaming?

I for one am not even convinced that Donald is not a grouper

I’m praying the babe will be named Dourtney.

Ugh I’m a terrible garbage monster who feeds on other people’s pain for thinking this, but I’m happy she’s getting divorced. Maybe it’s because I see my talented friends getting married young and I sometimes see it holding them back. When I found out she was in some long term young love marriage it just seemed totally…