I will always remember James for his astonishing debut as Bodysuit in the 2001 cult masterpiece The American Astronaut.

So, so punchable.

Based on the title alone, Syfy just ordered 6 episodes of Ghoststrippers. It's set at a haunted strip club called "Pole-tergeists."

Also: how is this not on NBC? And called something like Guttersnipers? Wednesdays, after an all new Chicago Fire.

It's like Spy Kids but starring children no one will ever love.

Reading Savage Love all these years taught me that somewhere, this is somebody's thing. Somebody wants to be Sabrina and somebody wants to be the pancakes.

"Itza joe-lee oh-lee-day wift yoo, Mary Poe-pins."

When Rick Perry wears his Smart Glasses, he looks like when Bizarro Superman pretends to be Bizarro Clark Kent.

"Aggregating" reheated reddit fan theories behind a paywall.

And BINGO was his name-o.

Alan Two Dicks has two dicks. And Mads Mikkelsen has at least nine.

The outfit is objectively badass,

You know, this is an awful lot of trouble for a poster that's only technically accurate for exactly one day.

It was supposed to say "Beloved Aunt."

The Alien Virgin Mary?

This time the story will follow a poor white mountain family who move to Beverly Hills after stumbling across an oil spring while on a routine hunting trip.

Tommy Wiseau made it all the way back to Doomstadt, his family castle in Latveria before he realized there was never a band called The Corsica Art Club. He had once again been duped by his most hated enemy, Mr. Fantastic. Tommy's techno-medieval armor weighed heavy on his shoulders as he lifted a single gauntleted…

Though it does seem like the Jeff Who Lives At Home of Native American Hitman movies.

"Are you a Knight of Ren? I've heard the deep space publicists talk about them. They live on the moons of Iego, I think. They're the most emotional creatures in the universe."

Easy. 2081's Facts Concerning the Late Arthur Jermyn and His Family starring Daniel Night-Lewis, Daniel Day-Lewis' nocturnal mutant grandson.