Shocked to see Chris D’Elia has been accused of being a comedian.

Unlike other products on McDonald’s menu, McFlurry demand is highly correlated to weather patterns. It’s a known fact that McFlurry demand increases proportionally to local temperatures. McDonald’s tracks their McFlurry orders from their 37,000+ global locations (think of them like ground level satellites) and sells…

Dude, you can make your own for like zero dollars. All you need is a woman willing to have sex with you, although that’s probably a stumbling point in the plan for most of us.

I’ve said it a million times but the Coogan law like they have in CA (requiring money earned by child performers to be set aside in trust for the child in an account parents can’t touch) should be passed nationwide and apply to family video bloggers/YT/Instagram stuff as well.

Where are these $5 whores of which you speak?

Where can I watch that movie

Now I’m imagining Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez feeding Trump a pie made out of his sons.

And doesn't seem to be bothered by rape. 

Well, he does like the incest

Another Trump fraudster. Harvard student? No. Fashion model? More like PR placement. Pro skater? Where? Poet? More like bad lyricist - to be charitable. Religious Jew? They really don’t intermarry, so even that doesn’t check out.

That’s why you call it a sandwich. Because you’re sandwiching it in

Let us know what price you end up paying for being an asshole.

Now you have pummeled testes and you still have to drink the house blend.

I recently pummeled my testes with a bag of marbles because I was dissatisfied with the Keurig flavors the admin has been buying for the breakroom.

A deuce is a deuce

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

FWIW, I don’t give a fuck about what you eat or why. And you shouldn’t care about “judgmental” internet commenters.

The AV Club has become a completely judgemental shithole, hasnt it? Is there a safe place for anyone these days? I cant walk out my front door without being ridiculed for something.

I hope Moore never concedes. I hope he shows up at the capitol on the day Jones is to be sworn in and winds up being forcibly removed from the building. I hope a female guard kicks Moore in the nards on his way out.

“Don’t buy me drink, I make my money. Don’t touch my weave, don’t call me ‘honey’ (I run my shit/I write my shit).”