hot dogs ... are sausage?

I can’t explain why but the continued use of “all takes matter” as the name of the show bothers me. It’s not terrible, it just reminds me of that friend you have who refers to Channing Tatum as Magic Mike and acts like it’s still semi-clever on the 900th time.
I mean, I do get not respecting this garbage pile, pube…

Serena’s always had a powerful serve from the deuce court.

This is pretty much true of everything. Kids, a house, a boat, a pool. Maybe not a car. But maybe a car.

As someone who is probably going to need to put their dog down within the month I would say you are absolutely incorrect. Rescue dog that I have poured more money for health issues into that I have spent on myself over that same amount of time. Dog that, as she has gotten older, sometimes pees on the carpet when it…

[Frinkiac]

Seriously man? At least have something funny in a shitty post.

if your idea of a fun outing for a bachelor/bachelorette outing is the museum or fruit picking then you’re too old to be getting married.

If you’re too sophisticated to get drunk at a bar where there happens to be naked chicks walking around, you are too boring to invite in the first place. Enjoy your leather bound books!

“hey, bro, what’s the plan for the bachelor party”

As I’ve entered my late 20s, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have an increasing number of pretentious fuckwads that would be checking in, taking selfies, constantly posting pictures and making epic status updates to this very type of trip.

LOL EVERYONE!!! We’re totally having fun ironically at a fucking science museum…

If I told my friends we were going fruit picking for my bachelor party they probably would have punched me in the face and drowned me in a river.

Yeah, I feel like your wrote this to make your situation better/normalize it in your own head. it’s less about last night of freedom!!!! and more about bonding.

If one of my friends told me he was doing this and invited me, I’d laugh in his face and probably skip the wedding. Also, I wouldn’t be friends with the kind of person who would do this.

Fruit picking.

No. No no no no no. No.

Counterpoint: No f***ing way.

As a Sox fan, I’m obviously frustrated here. But reading this makes me honestly feel bad for the guy. Struggling with an eating disorder / weight issue must be awful, and having to do so in public for the Red Sox must fucking suck. I hope he understands the worst case scenario isn’t losing his job but endangering his…

#BlackTopMatters

I’m so utterly confused. Have you guys watched baseball lately? It’s boring. Hawk is a homer and an old man. Is there anything wrong with a sag-balls geriatric actively rooting for his team in the broadcast? I mean really, this man is a national treasure. Sure as hell beats listening to the Stone Pony ramble about…