It's impossible to listen to more than once, because it hurts. Transcribing is not possible.

Isn't Deadspin usually on the players' sides in instances like this? These LaRoche stories seem to all be in the tone unlike anything else on this site. And, now that we know it was in LaRoche's contract, it really is a fucked up situation.

Yeah, I see your point, but on the other hand GAME OF THRONES IS COMING BACK, Y’ALL!! WOOOO!!!

Could have also taken his QO for $15.8 million for this season.

Full disclosure: I am a Nationals season ticket holder. I truly hope this is a change of scenery thing for Ian, because last season he kept digging his hole deeper and deeper. His plate discipline became so poor that I swear to God I thought he might swing at a pitchout. He responds very poorly to being under…

Please clap.

Jeb Bush is two black dots rolling in the eyeholes of a soggy paper plate mask.

I’ve printed and framed this comment, because it is the worst joke ever told.

“Jesus, thats pretty bad. Ten games”

“We’re talking about celebrity stuff, not politics.”...solid description of the GOP debates

If you dig back further, you’ll find Schlereth tell Thenextking83, “There’s a reason God didn’t call it the Bering Homosexual.”

no....its my song

find what you love and let it kill you

To be fair, I wouldn't turn down the four dollars.

You can’t be flopping the nuts at a poker table.

No, the NFL is the tobacco company that admits smoking cigarettes might cause cancer, but damn if they aren’t smooth and delicious...why don’t you enjoy one now?
Oh and we have top men working on that cancer stuff, so don’t worry. TOP MEN.

To be fair, brain damage likely accounts for over 50% of his support.

no one doubts Kelly’s schemes, play-calling acumen, or ability to get the most out of a questionable quarterback.

“Wealthy people like to buy things and have their way,” Rickman said. “Historic districts are fragile.”