Dude, Chicago cops have been begging for gun control for a long time.

I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard some idiot say they don’t want to wear a helmet because “I’d rather be dead than be a vegetable” or something similarly stupid that sounds tough.

I doubt 96 shots happens unless the officers at least believed that the guy shot first.

Well, it’s not just that it won’t happen. It’s that banning guns isn’t going to take guns away, at least in big cities. Gangs will get guns. First, they’re already out there, and confiscation of all the unregistered guns would probably take like a century. Also, we have a long border with Mexico where a ton of…

The Arch Deluxe is the best fast food burger ever made.

I think the key you’re not giving enough emphasis to is the toasting.  Yeah, soda bread begins to get stale quickly, but that is easily fixed by toasting it.  In fact, I think it’s better toasted than it is fresh, even.  Toast lightly and slather it with Irish butter.  Oh man, I’m getting hungry just thinking about it.

I feel like Olive Garden has come full circle with the American public:

You’ve never tried it, yet think you know enough about it to define what it is, and you apparently don’t know what a “casserole” is.

OK, so two things:

Wait.... is Brad DRINKING A CAPPUCCINO IN THE AFTERNOON?!?!?!? Any Italian knows that cappuccinos must only be consumed before noon. 

The best frozen “Chef” food I’ve had is from Ayo Foods. They make West African frozen entrees using chefs who are experts in that cuisine.  Just about everything I’ve had from them is delicious.  The chicken dishes are especially good.  They use shredded dark meat chicken instead of chunks of white meat that barely…

Oh, I’m sure. He and his wife are both on that line between hippie and hipster , and they possibly don’t even have ketchup in the house. 

The Monster Cereals don’t taste the same as they used to. The pieces used to be smaller and have denser texture and more flavor, and I swear the marshmallows used to be flavored also. Count Chocula is still pretty close flavor-wise, but Boo Berry (which used to be my fave) and Franken Berry are hollow shells of what…

I also love that people who “love” the Constitution so much seem so intent on ignoring parts of it that get in their way, like the right to interstate travel.

Probably very difficult to enforce, my guess is the only people prosecuted will be people ratted out by angry fathers who didn’t want the abortion.

Clarence Thomas is in an interracial marriage.  Doesn’t get more awkward than that!

I believe their current strategy to appeal to black voters is to try to convince them to hate the same people (especially LGBTQ and Latin American immigrants) as Republicans do.

Yes. Being married 3x and cheating unabashedly on all three of them (including with at least one adult video star) = not disqualifying.

Yes, the queso has always been the thing that put Qdoba on top for me.

My favorite chip is Zapp’s Voodoo chips (or Spicy Voodoo, which I can’t find anywhere but Potbelly). They sound very much like the All Dressed flavor.  I believe they are supposedly a mix of all of Zapp’s standard flavoring powders.